If I Let Go

Epilogue

It's Christmas Eve and I am in our upcountry home with my parents. As soon as schools closed for the holidays, I packed and drove all the way here.

June was disappointed that I wouldn't be vacationing with her but I insisted I needed a change of scenery to clear my mind. I need to begin the new decade with a different mind set. I need to come back with to the city with no left over feelings for a certain student.

I am currently in my bedroom trying to get a nap but failing to do so. It appears I have rested enough. I toss in bed for a few minutes until I decide going through my phone would be a better idea. Melissa is touring the farm with dad while mom is babysitting the kids.

I unplug my phone from the charger and see that June sent me pictures of her and Stan in their beach costumes in Zanzibar. June looks so carefree in her two piece suit and Stan has draped his arm across her back. They look so happy and I feel pangs of jealousy. June is online and we begin chatting.

You  look good, I am glad you did not talk me into playing the role of a third wheel

Come on, I would have found a hot guy for you

Oh, and who might that be?

You don't have to wonder anymore, he is texting you in a few. Way more handsome than Melissa's pick

I laugh in spite of myself recalling my failed date with Tony. The date was a disaster and a total waste of my time. My blind date talked about himself majority of the afternoon and I got the impression that he is used to bragging about his achievements to lure a girl to his bed. That or he was just nervous.

I never bothered to find out though and when he suggested a second date, I told him I was going to be out of town for at least two months. I have not heard from him since then. Thankfully.

Glad y'all think I need a rescue team when it comes to men. I can handle my love life quite perfectly, thanks but no thanks 

Could have fooled me. His name is Peter

In that instant my phone vibrates and I see that Peter guy has decided to call. Most people would normally send a text and ask if they can call. Not a smart move. I hope he has a funny side or I will block him.

“ Salina.” Marks voice comes into the phone and I almost faint. I had deleted his number when it came apparent that we are not capable of reaching a consensus about some things. But after all this while, I can't believe how much I miss the way my names rolls on his tongue.

"Hi," I reply shakily.

"I called to wish you a Merry Christmas," Mark says coolly. "And to check on you."

“Merry Christmas Mark."

Neither of us speaks again and there are so many things I want to say but I don't open my mouth. It is best that I let go. In any case, I found my closure. Sort of.

"I also called to apologize."

"For what?"

"For how things ended between us. I was such an asshole for not trying to see things from your point of view."

"It's okay," I say playing with the hem of my top. I am glad he called to apologize, I at least deserve that.

I am also painfully aware that this could be our very last conversation as I do not plan to run into him next semester. I will find a way to swap classes with June if necessary. I also want my last words to him to not bear any hint of anger or hurt.

"I don't hold that against you anymore. Thanks for calling. Enjoy your holiday, Mark."

"Don't hang up yet. There is something else. I want to patch things up and I think I found a way without putting any of us at risk. I will defer school next semester while I try to enroll in a different campus," Mark rushes to say.

Whilst I find this new development exhilarating, I am not selfish enough not to consider what this means to him. What he is sacrificing so that he fulfills my every wish.

"What about your father?"

"What about him?" Mark asks distractedly.

"He will disinherit you and officially disown you as his son. Or was that just a story you fabricated at the beginning to dim any hope of us ever working out?" I demand.

Mark laughs. "I didn't lie to you, Salina. I had a talk with him and we reached at an all or nothing sort of compromise."

"What do you mean?"

"He asked that he withholds my promotion for a while longer. He will appoint someone to replace him temporarily and I have to make good my promise to be a responsible student and employee."

"That's amazing!"  I exclaim unable to hide to hide my excitement. "Wait, are you sure?"

"We didn't exactly have a written agreement but we had witnesses," Mark jokes and I laugh along. "Where are you celebrating Christmas?"

"With my parents,"  I answer automatically. "And you?"

"With you."

"I don't get back to the city till after New Years," I say apologetically.  "I am in my upcountry home with my folks."

"I was banking on that. I am parked outside your gate."

"What?" I say and automatically look outside my window. Unfortunately, my height doesn't allow me to peep properly.

"I sent a message to your sister on Face book and I got the directions. But not before she threatened to hunt me to the ends of the earth should I break your heart. I gotta say your sister is something else," Mark chuckles.

"Tell me about it." I have no doubt Melissa gave him grief.

"I love you, Salina Sharon Zungu," Mark says suddenly.

I smile and say back in a lower voice, "Took you long enough to figure that one out. I love you too."

"I was a fool," he admits. "Also, I was hoping you would join me for a short drive."

"I would love to."

I hang up and jump from my bed to get dressed in more decent clothes. I fetch my boots from the rack and text Melissa on my way out.