The Acceptance Of Wing Beats

July 30th

I met my uncle.

Or I suppose I've met one of them.

I was laying in bed because I'm always laying in bed. Because I cannot do anything else.

I was listening to my bees hum, while I drifted between everything and nothing when my door opened.

A tall brown man with long braided black hair stood in my doorway. He was a tree of a man.

That made me sad.

He wore a burgundy suit with a long matching coat. His neck and wrists were covered in colorful beads and charms.

That made me even sadder.

"Aamira," he said softly. As though my name was fragile and as if he were too rough with it it would shatter. "Are you sleeping?"

I didn't answer him.

How could I?

I don't know if I am sleeping. This often feels like a dream but other times it all feels all too much like reality.

He walked across the room and around my bed with long graceful steps. His eyes widened when he saw I was sitting up and staring at him.

Then he did something I had not expected him to do... He smiled. He looked at me like I was the ghost of an old friend, come to reassure him of the afterlife.

I may be a ghost, but I can offer no reassurance.

He clasped his hands. His beads and rings rattled. "I am so happy to see you. May I sit? " he asked gesturing to my bed.

I nodded.

He sat.

"I have to admit, I have been worried sick," he said, his voice low, like a mudslide. " I am sorry that we haven't been to see you. With Aabigail's" he paused, finding his words.

"Condition. The doctor needed all hands on deck to take shifts watching her. To make sure someone was there if she woke up. But the extra nurses have just arrived. They were delayed because Osage was under siege. We basically had to smuggle nurses. Can you believe it? Remember when you could just hire people with a phone call?" He chuckled resting his chin on his hand.

I stared at him.

"Anyway. I bet the war is the last thing you want to talk about. What is important is that I'm here now and we are together." He smiled again. 

I continued to stare at him. I can't put into words how I was feeling. 

It was as if I was in a reverse vacuum. As though I had been sitting in an airless room that had suddenly been filled with air. 

He clasped his hands, "Your Uncle Issac sends his regards. He is stuck on the other side of Mason. He can seemingly send endless letters but he can't send himself. Of course, I would rather a letter get lost in the mail than him" He laughed again, though this time it was a bit sadder. 

I was confused. I suppose I assumed he was my uncle. But after taking another look at him and could not find any resemblance between him and my father.

No, it wasn't my father he reminded me of. it was her.

My mother. 

This man a cruel mirror of who she used to be. 

A cruel reminder of what I had lost. 

"Who are you?" I asked, suddenly aware that this is a question I should have asked the strange man as soon as he entered my room.