When You Left

16

*Benny on the side. Ezra Miller is a god.*

11. 06. 13.

        Someone asked me if I was married today.

        It was an extremely beautiful man with a funny looking beanie on that came in to buy The Grapes of Wrath. He started a debate with me over the main characters. He is very smart; said his name was Benny. Yeah, like the song.

        Just as I was ringing him up, he pointed to the promise ring on my finger and asked if I was married. It was a friendly question, but it still managed to make me squirm and my heart to ache. I just told him no and gave him his book. He looked relieved from my answer. He wrote his number on my palm and told me to call him.

        I still remember the day you gave it to me. On our second anniversary you took me out on a cliché date. That’s what you even labeled it; ‘The Ultimate Cliché Date.’

        We went to the fair and rode on the Ferris wheel –you demanded that I kiss you at the top. I did- we even went through the love tunnel, much to my protests. Then you bought me a giant stuffed rhino, because I have a weird thing for rhinos. Then you took me to a pizza joint and made me only order a salad because you said;

        “That’s what most girls do on a first date.”

        Then I argued with you about you being sexist and you called me a feminist. I laughed. After dinner, it was eight o’clock and you said the cliché date was over. I was thrilled, honestly.

        You drove me to the bookshop where we met and where I now work at. You led me up the stairs and to the roof. There, you had set up a miniature fort with pillows, blankets, and a mother-load of junk food. You even set up a screen with a projector so we could watch all of the B horror films I constantly obsess over.

        I was shocked, of course because you had never been one for romance. You told me that romance was for suckers that tried too hard and didn’t know love. That if you truly clicked with someone, you didn’t need grand gestures. But, you did it for me. Because I loved romance, the wooing, the corny pick-up lines, the gifts, I loved the whole shebang. And you did it just for me.

        So, we started to watch ‘Creature from the Black Lagoon’ and you had been stroking my left hand absentmindedly. But, after a while I felt you slip something on my finger. It was silver, and embedded with small diamonds surrounding a pearl daisy, because that’s all you could afford. A symbol of your love; of everything you wanted with me. And when I looked up, you had a bashful grin on your face that made your dimples pop out on your cheeks. I swear I actually melted.

        “One day, I am going to marry you. When I am successful and can provide for you. You will be mine. You are mine.”

        And you said it with so much determination and certainty that I believed you. Your kind gesture made me completely embarrassed that I had just gotten you an old typewriter for your novel.

        I still wear it. I don’t think I’ll be able to ever take it off.

I’m not going to call Benny,

Daisy