YOONJIN | Awkward Silence

"You don't deserve to be hurt like this."

The next few days, Yoongi was quieter and clingier than usual.  Always had to be by Jin's side or else he'd freak out but still would talk less to the male.

He met Jeongguk's parents who were practically skin and bones, having been eating less and less to let Jeongguk stay in the hospital.

He couldn't be mad at them. They were obviously upset too.

Yoongi also had a chance to see the younger's body, the drug finally done with it's crime of taking the boy's life.  He cried till there was nothing left.

Jin cried when alone.

"Yoon eat," Jin urged the tiny male who had been too upset to even go to physical therapy.  The lady didn't mind, letting him try simple excersices that would test his limits but not push his limited motivation.

Yoongi nodded slowly, opening his mouth and letting Jin feed him slowly before he leaned back into his wheelchair, staring at the spot where Jeongguk would sit.

He still missed him as if it happened yesterday instead of a week before.

Yoongi stared at the table, Jin lovingly stroking his hair.  He leaned into the elders touch, "S-sleep."

"Okay, love."

Yoongi wiped at his teary eyes, he knew Jin was hurting too but was able to hide it.  They both loved him as family. 

Jin settled Yoongi onto his bed, Yoongi letting out heartbreaking sobs.  Yoongi was an emotional wreck with the loss of his best friend, to the point they had begun monitoring his heart for risks.  Dying from a broken heart was possible after all.

"H-He's gone.."

Jin was silent, biting back his own tears as Yoongi cried till his face was coated with dry tears and his throat sore from crying so hard. 

Yoongi laid there, on his side, staring at the couch where Jeongguk had laid the night before his assisted suicide.  That's what it was.  Assisted suicide. 

Yoongi's lip quivered despite him not having anymore tears.  He let out a strained croak that held all the emotion, Jin hugging him tightly and crying into his neck. 

Yoongi felt oddly comforted, Jeongguk was like a brother to Jin and was Yoongi's first and best friend.  Jin was more, Jeongguk was the only one who knew that.

And now he was gone.

Yoongi ran his fingers through Jin's hair softly, though his hands were shaking and weak.  "I-I want him back, Hyung..."

"Me too, Yoong, me too." Jin muttered, guilt creeping into the back of his head, fighting to be pushed back so he wouldn't spill what he had done.  "This hurts more than any disorder," He muttered.  "My painkillers can't stop this... At least he's happy..."

Yoongi nodded, kissing Jin's head.  He as wasn't good at giving affection that could express emotions seeing as he was normally on the receiving end.  But Jin could read him like an open book, every movement and kiss making the adult who hid all his pain from not only losing his younger brother but from years of weakness, he easily broke.

"H-Hyung, your going to make m-me cry again..."

"I'm so sorry, baby, I'm so so sorry.."

"What... I-It was Kook's choice..."

"You didn't get a goodbye, you didn't get an explanation, you're too nice for me... you don't deserve to be hurt like this." Jin mumbled, cupping Yoongi's face between his palms and pressing a short, sweet kiss to his lips, not giving Yoongi the chance to understand.  "You don't deserve this and it's too late to change anything.  Go to sleep, baby, I-I have something to do tomorrow, okay?"

Yoongi nodded, silent and once again teary eyed as he thought things over, alone with his thoughts as Jin slowly shut the door on his way out.  His heart hurt despite the events, hurt with the longing and hurt with the pain he shared with Jin.