EXO IMAGINES

Baekhyun - Separate Dreams

It was tough and no one said it was easy but it was worth it, to you, it really was. Being in a relationship with someone who wasn’t home all the time, someone who would be on the road, going on tons of flights, visiting different countries and performing for others to make plenty of people happy as their job, living their dreams despite not having you by their side – it was hard but like mentioned, it was worth it.

It has never crossed your mind that it would end but he slowly started to disappear from your life. Daily you’d wait for his texts, telling you he landed safely or if he’s eaten his meal yet. You’d be wondering what he’s done for his day or his favorite song lately or even if he’s getting tired with anything just yet; which was mostly everything since it was hectic but to him, it was worth it.

You find yourself waiting longer than usual for a text and it dragged on for God only knows how long. From a minute, to thirty minutes, to a few hours, to a few days – the gap kept increasing as the days went by and you didn’t know how to wrap your head around the situation. Then it came down to neglecting your calls, arguments over the phone and unwanted feelings in between it all to fester altogether; it was turning into a shipwreck despite having a beautiful beginning to the perfect sailing.

On a day you remember you just told him that you’ve been missing him dearly. Words of “I really miss you,” and all you could hear was soft breathing over the phone. It tore you to pieces when he didn’t respond the way he’d usually would. A tired yet genuine I miss you, I really want to go home to you but just a while more yet, nothing. He didn’t bother and he didn’t even try at the very least, you couldn’t feel anything. From the toe curling cuteness he’d try to portray over the phone with that bone shaking voice he’d use on you to make your heart floating to cloud nine – to nothing but just a cold hum on the other end as if you owe him everything but love.

It was cruel and you couldn’t even remember how you managed through the night the moment you hung up, not expecting anything anymore from the person who promised you the moon and stars.

Two knocks on the door was all it took for you to stand up from the sofa, unsure if you really wanted to open the door for the person standing on the other end. You knew it was going to be hard but this was your happiness standing out there, the person who promised to love you through thick and thin and that no one could ever, ever, ever come between nor anything else for that matter. You had doubts and boy, you had plenty of them as your hand lingered on the doorknob, already feeling the heat gathering in your eyes as you knew what was going to go down.

It’s going to happen, it’s going to happen, you already know this so just let it happen.

You braced yourself hard as you opened the door, and he heard the click on the other end to signal that you had opened the door. Your eyes scanned his features, from the cherry red cheeks he’d have from smiling too hard to the pale white color that painted his cheeks instead. That sparkle he’d have in his eyes had faded and that glorious, heartwarming smile he’d possess had gone away – how long as this been going on?

Rather… how long have the both of you carried on like this; living each day as if it was suffering, dreading to the next day because you just knew that an argument would occur? How long as it been since the both of you called each other in a loving tone? How long has it truly been since he called you his world, since he told you that you’re the moon that lights up the stars in his life?

Since when did this love become so hurtful?

You couldn’t take how his eyes looked at you so pitifully, you couldn’t take the fact that you knew you’d be bawling over in the sofa, trying hard to let go of all the fond memories you both share, you couldn’t take the fact that you love him more than you love yourself.

You couldn’t.

What broke your heart even more was before he left, with all the bitter words out of the way, his final sentence was I’m sorry, believe me, I love you…

But not in that way anymore.

You felt nudges on your arm and it felt like something was trying to stir you out from the darkness that enveloped you so deep, it felt impossible to escape despite the willpower you had to break free. It was more than a struggle but it was like a battle, a war and it’s like your life was at stake. You couldn’t tell what was going on and you didn’t know how to-

“Wake up…!”

“Please just, oh my god—wake up!”

It took you a moment but the second your eyes came to an open, you noticed how it was blurry than usual. Two seconds had passed and you could only then realize that tears were trickling down your cheeks and you were at home, in the living room with your phone in your hand as you left it stretched out before you fell asleep. He removed your phone away, guiding you to sit up on the sofa so he could crouch before you, eyes staring into you intensely as he licked his lips nervously, his hands already brushing away the painful tears that seemed to be painful for nothing – he was looking at you in a way that you couldn’t receive….

“B-Baek,”

“Why are you crying? W-Was it a bad dream? Are you hurt?” He sputtered out any thoughts he had, any rough ideas or conclusions he had, he thrown it out hurriedly as he continuously stroked the under your eyes, his heart feeling immense pain upon watching you cry – he could never comprehend that.

You nodded your head with a soft whimper, slipping his hands away from your cheeks just so you could embrace him. You didn’t care if you’d damp his shirt but at this time, he didn’t keep that in mind either but to hold onto you, keeping you near as he felt you crying into his shoulder, wincing and sniffling with the tears still rolling down, seeping into his shirt.

“H-Honey…” He rasped, long arms enclosed around you to promise you that whatever that had happened in your dream, remains in your dream. He didn’t exactly know what it was and he didn’t want to know because he knows that it’ll break you even more and himself if he were to listen to you try to explain it in complete detail.

“Please say this is real, tell me it’s real,” You croaked out, a total mess as you grasped onto him as if he was going to disappear, as if he would turn into dust and leave you in your memory.

He nodded twice without hesitations, stroking the back of your head with his honey-like voice melting your insides, “I-I’m here, this is real. I’m real.” He assured you the best way he could, sensing that possibly, you had a dream of him while he was away. He had just returned not too long ago, five minutes, that is. He tried to be silent, thinking you’d be asleep by now and he was right – half right, actually. He wasn’t so silent anymore from the moment he heard whines from the sofa and shuffles from the living room. When he took a few steps into the light, casting a look around, he discovered where the sounds were coming from.

“I love you Baek,” You breathed out in need, still keeping him ever so close, “I love you so much…”

He closed his eyes, exhaling a deep breath upon hearing how petrified you were – just what were you dreaming about? He could feel you trembling and he didn’t like it one bit. His arms tightened around you and he says it like it’s the first time when he whispers back I love you. You felt him kissing your hair and his hand stroking your back while the other remained by your waist. He whispered soft assurances of everything he promised since he left, before he left and from the moment he told you he loves you. He leaned away and kisses you like it’s the last time but assures you once more that it’s not going to be the last time. He strokes your cheeks, on your tearstained cheeks and tells you how silly you are for thinking he’d ever leave the one person who thought him the true feeling of love. He’d tease you about it later on but for now, he was here to soothe your aching heart and make sure he’d seal up all the cracks in your heart and brush away those thoughts of insecurities that he’d ever not love you.

The last thing you could remember before you fall asleep in his arms were I’m sorry, believe me, I love you—to the moon and back.”