The Journals of Wade Dillans: The Four Seasons of August

Still, August 15

~Talisbury Medical Center- Report by Patient # 8191983

08/15/1999

I ran home, even if my classes weren't finished. I can't go to school. It was too much for me. I didn't wanna feel alone, I hate that. I hate the point that my parent are fighting. I hate the point that my only friend left me alone when I needed her the most. When all these hates, problems and bullshit pile-up on me, I feel as if the world doesn't want me to go on.

 About half-way home it started to rain, but I didn't care. The rain was nothing compared to what I felt. I didn't even shield myself, I just ran through.

The rain became heavier as I approached my house. I was now soaked, people were giving me looks as I pass-by. After awhile, I finally reached my house. I dropped my bag at the side of the floor and closed the door and exclaimed "Mom!". There was no answer. I looked around the house, the kitchen, the yard, the bathroom, the basement, the rooms, the attic. Mom wasn't there. I knew she should be home because it's her day-off, but still she's not here. Maybe she's at one of her friend house or shopping.

I lied down on our couch and thought about everything, the ups, the downs, the people and what they did to me whether it's good or bad, or maybe both; Then, I fell asleep with the soft pound of the  rain on the roof above me singing me to sleep.

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~Talisbury Medical Center- Report by Patient # 8191983

08/15/1999

I woke up around seven in the evening. I was tired because of this morning. I looked around the house but mom was still not there. It was still raining and this time there was thunder and lightning. It was dark outside. As if there was nothing out there. I'm worried about the rain because I know that the river overflows everytime it rains like this. But, I'm even more worried about mom, who still isn't here. I sat down upright on the couch and opened the T.V. and the news was on. "All major Bridges that cross the river are not passable due to floods." The anchorman of the local news said in one of those deep radio voices "A truck crashed on several cars, several rescue teams already on-site.". The news wasn't pleasant I wondered how many lives were affected, how many were injured. I switched the channel as the bad news didn't make me feel better.

The next channel was showing a documentary about people who got beaten up by their own fathers. I still see a lot of people being beaten, just like what I saw outside the convenience store when I went there with Dianna. When I passed out and yes, Mr. Carson, I passed out and I think I got robbed. I was still seeing these people getting battered by someone. In my dreams and even when I'm awake. Soon enough I began to dream that someone was battering me. But, it was only dreams so I didn't and still don't mind.

Michelle barked. I forgot that she was there. I didn't even notice her when she followed me around the house, when she sat on the floor beside me and watched me sleep, and when she cuddled with my legs as I watched the news. I appreciated this so I told her "Michelle you're a good girl." and I smiled. I let her up the sofa and we watched the news together.

The phone started to ring. I answered it "Hello?". Nobody answered only this static and a bit of voices. I asked again. "Hello?" mom finally answered "Wade? are you alright? Are you safe?" She obviously watched the news.

"Yea me and Michelle are alright." I told her over the loud static.

"Good. I can't come home tonight. Your dad uh... got into some trouble. I'll tell you tomorrow. Just be safe"

"But..." I quickly answered but she already ended the call.

That call pretty much meant that I was going to be alone tonight. Well, not alone exactly. I was with Michelle.

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~Talisbury Medical Center- Report by Patient # 8191983

08/16/1999

I woke up but I didn't feel like going to school. I let Michelle sleep on my bed to accompany me through my dreams and nightmares, but mostly, nightmares. That night I had that same dream, the one where people were getting battered. I know that you will be bothered with this Dr. Carson, but I suggest ignoring it.

I ate breakfast after that. Cereal and orange juice. I ate outside on our back porch that had a coffee table and a roof. It was still raining by the way. Although, the rain was lighter than last night's. The wind was definitely felt in our backyard. the lounge char was now in a place where lounge chairs shouldn't be. The umbrella that used to be beside the lounge chair was now gone. I wondered what happened to the rest of the town. But, I knew that everyone is alright. People in this town are experienced with these kinds of things.

I did nothing for the rest of the morning but sleep and think about life. Then, watch television. Then, lie down on the floor with Michelle. Then, think about life. Television. Lie down on the floor. It just repeats again and again and again. Until, mom arrives at about noon. 

She brought lunch with her. It was Chinese food and "Ka-Ching" was printed on the side of the paper bag with Chinese characters printed below it. The restaurant was in my dream a few days ago. It was weird. It's probably from the other town.

After eating I just slept.

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