Crossroad between the choppy waves and serene fields

The melody that fills the air

Fingers playfully danced as sheets of melody continue to fill the soul as the music repeats again perfecting every tempo and beat

"Stop stop stop" that's not right. It's got to go slower and then pick it up gracefully again at that note. The whole floor stopped again.

It was rather frustrating as the entire chamber of orchestra team had gone through this particular sheet for 10 times yet it doesn't pick up the last verse correctly. And the instructor has single out Kay again. They had to follow his lead but today he wasn't making it easy for them.

"Let's take 5!"

"What wrong? He was confronted later. You are not getting it the right tempo and note, we did well yesterday but it's not working out again today.

"Sorry perhaps can we go onto the other pieces I'll practice it again tonight and let's try it again tomorrow. We can work on the rest first."

"Okay but I want to see results by tomorrow"

It was pressurising as this team of orchestra players consisted of the best, ranging from different countries and he had been selected for this particular performance they had for an upcoming event.

"You play it again, close your eyes just feel each note, you will know when to pick it up, go with it, feel the flow you will know when to pick up it comes naturally ....." keep trying until you get it, just relax breathe and feel the music in your vein and let the emotions flow and when you sing it let it come out like how you feel it" a voice rang into his head.

He re-played the version that they had played together back then - the sound of piano and violin blended so well with the team and as the soft sound of guitar string enters to pick it up the tempo it was a perfect match ...the gentle yet sharp melodious tone blending in softly, contemporary in itself yet so beautiful. Just majestic as the background were filled with many lovely scenes that was put together to blend in with the performance. Just lovely and lively as the audiences soul quietly feasted to the sweet sound that fills the hall.

And that inspiration he kept close to him, pushing himself to always achieve his best in everything he does.

He went on to perform perfectly with a standing ovation that day. The lights and stage ...reminded him of the old days yet he had promised to move on and not look back. Kay love classical to a certain extend it always has a place in his heart. But he had left his piano, violin and orchestra music untouched ever since that fateful day that he doesn't speak about. It brings back unbearable memories that he had not been able to erase. It was only recently that he had picked it up again. 2.5 years of soul searching and reconciliation with himself made him realised life is much bigger, music is his life and soul. He had move on from the fateful day when the sky rained endlessly when the news broke out about the passing of a very close friend. It was beyond words. 

"How is he?" His sponsors would ask months after the quietness. He had taken off to travel leaving everything behind. There were no words left to be spoken, just shocked that Jon left them behind not explaining this whole incident that he had been blaming himself on - should he had taken the time to meet him more, should he had been around more for him, would it be different.

And being closely knitted so closely knitted made it even harder. But the passing was just too sudden to absorb. Yet he had to deal with questions being one of the closest. He simply can't stand there and stay composed...the expectations that he was just another composed professional, not even allowed to grief and throw his tantrum, not wanting to turn up for work to mourn wasn't even a choice to consider and all these are not acceptable in the eyes of others, everything was confined to a parameter of what we should do how we should act, not able to cry in front of the press and public was just insane, the scripted days for him and composed self is inhumane let alone tormenting to the people around him....and that's when he realises this is the path they had chosen, where their lives is not theirs while it's a profession but in it he lost his identity.