The Man In A Fedora

Chapter 20:Temporary Fix

05/27/2019

I could already see the picture I'd be painting right when I looked at the empty canvas.
I had been getting a lot of inspirations,and almost all of them were related to Harold.
When you get the perfect inspiration,things happen pretty quickly.
Brushes start to fly around in a perfect harmony till they create a perfect painting.
After I heard his story, I had several dreams about it.
The reflection of the portal he painted in my mind was ready to be drawn on the canvas
I promised myself not to go any further but the portal alone seemed so empty that my artist instincts wanted to add more to it.
I wanted to draw him to complete the picture cause he was the missing piece of the puzzle.
I knew in the back of my mind that he wouldn't like the idea of him being drawn but I wanted to surprise him.
Displaying it was something I didn't even bother considering cause I knew it might effect the future.
I heard some noises in the back the moment I left a brushstroke.
Turning my head to the back, I saw Harold standing there like a ghost.
I could tell by the shadowy look on his face that something was bothering him.
Walking closer to him and cleaning my painted hands by patting my dirty apron
"Oh I didn't realize you're here" I said.

"Stop painting that portal,please." he said, almost begging.

I wanted to know the thing that caused him to come to me just to beg,wanted to know the thing that caused him to be that desperate.
Although I knew he could travel back and forth in time
"Wait,how do you know that?" I asked.

His tone was low, not because he was calm. He clearly was suffering.
"It'll cause trouble." he quickly answered.

I could see how he avoided complex talks,which was not a really Harold thing to do.
If he told me to destroy that painting,there must had been a strong reason for that.
And doubting him was the last thing I'd ever think of.
But I had to know the reason behind it.

Getting closer to him to see his face clearly
"But how,I'm not even planning to display it. " I said.

Placing one of his hands on my shoulder and looking me in the eye
"I know but it'll effect the future somehow, I'm trying to figure out how." he said.
He was treating me as if I was a fragile little flame that could extinguish anytime soon and I had no idea why.

Nodding continuously
"Okay, I can paint something else." I said.

I had a feeling he wasn't expecting me to accept it this easily.
Glancing away for a second
"Do you hate me?" he asked.

I was so confused over that unexpected question.
"What,no!" I yelled, as if it was a quick reflex.

"Be honest with me. If you want me to go,just ask." he said,looking me right in the eye this time.

More than just confused I was horrified by these questions. He had never been that unsure about himself.
And now I was to afraid to know the reason behind all of these, cause I had strong a feeling it was me.

Holding his hand on my shoulder
"What are you talking about Harold, why would I want that?" I replied.

After making his mind for a second
" 'I've been tolerating you just because I pity you, how fucking lonely you are ,but I'm done with it. Get out of my life cause you're ruining it! I wish I never met you.' " he said.

At first I thought those cruel words were directed towards me but a worse possibility appeared on my mind.
A possibility of me directing them at him.
"What?" I asked, narrowing my eyes.

Pulling his hand away
"That's exactly what you're gonna say to me when I visit you a week later. That's why I'm here,to fix the awful mess I've created. I should've came here at the first place,if only I used my logic instead of my urges." he said.
He was constantly fighting with himself.