Dekuverse dekubowl

Female-deku

Op-deku and main-deku have been dating for about a month but main-deku came to a sudden realisation. He wasn't actually gay! Therefore, he was legally obliged to date the only female in this universe, female-deku!

"hello female-deku" said main-deku "i like your long, green hair!"

"i thought you were gay lol" she said in return "also why did you date a table?"

Main-deku ignored this and decided that they were fated partners. "Female-deku, you are 100% my fated partner. Because your the only woman here lol". Main-deku and female-deku then stared at each other for a few minutes before going off to their first lesson

Main-deku was trying to do maths but all he could think about how thicc female-deku was. "Main-deku, please stop fantasising about female-deku and do your work" said teacher-deku. Main-deku was confused as to how teacher-deku could read his mind. 

"oi, main-deku! Your dumped for not being gay" op-deku yelled. Everyone in the classroom gasped. Even the table. Op-deku and Main-deku had been dating for ages but there relationship was ended so fast. "Also you can't live in my house anymore noob"

After school, main-deku went back to his room, picked up his rather mouldy potato and then went back to live in his rubbish bin. Main-deku then sat in his rubbish bin sulking when female-deku arrived. "hey main-deku, i felt really sorry for you so i came to kill you. Put you out of your misery you know?" 

Female-deku was about to happily kill main-deku when he insisted that she shouldn't. She looked rather put out by this, and proceeded to try and kill herself instead "err, female-deku? What the heck are you doing?" 

"I am sorry but i was so desperate to kill you and your stupid little face and now that chance has been taken away from me, i am very sad." Then female-deku ran off crying, tripped over and started bleeding out onto the floor. Main-deku would have called for an ambulance, but he didn't have a phone.