Dekuverse dekubowl

Table-Deku... again

Main-Deku once again walked up to table-Deku and once again asked table-Deku to date him. Once again, table-Deku didn't respond, probably becuase he was still a table. Main-Deku was once again slightly disappointed but once again tried to date him. 

Main-Deku had always had a secret love for table-Deku, even while he was dating other dekus. Main-Deku had never acctually broken up with table-Deku, he just gave up after a failed robbery of school property. This time was different though! Table-Deku was an actual student in the class, sitting on a chair and behind another desk.

Unsurprisingly, new-teacher-Deku was teachering maths. "So table-Deku, what is the square root of 9?" he asked. Table-Deku didn't reply, probably becuase he was a table. New-teacher-Deky just presumed he was very shy. He didn't question peoples race so never looked into the issue of why one of his students was a desk. 

New-teacher-Deku also had a tree in his classroom, which instead of leaves, had long, green hair. The tree also sat behind a desk and on a chair. There was even a little hole in the roof for the trees leaves. New-teacher-deku didn't even know if tree-deku could hear him, as his head(?) was 20 meters above the roof of the school. 

Main-Deku, distracted by the beauty of table-Deku, wasn't doing maths. It was 5 minutes until the end of the day and Main-Deku was planning his escape route with table-Deku. Main-Deku was looking forward to a fun evening with table-Deku tonight.

As soon as the lesson was over, he grabbed british-Deku, swung him around by his feet and smashed the window with his head. Main-Deku then picked up table-Deku, jumped out of the window with him, carefully stepped over british-Dekus dead body and running back to his bin. His plan was successful!

When back at the bin, Main-deku spent some time looking at table-Dekus, becuase he was so beautiful. What a well-designed table! There was lots of room to move your legs, a drawer underneath for small items and four, stable legs so it wouldn't wobble! Main-Deku was so inpressed that he did the business right there and then. 

Or at least, he tried to. As soon as he had started, he realised that there was nowhere for 'it' to go. How is he supposed to have the fun times when table-Deku didn't have any kind of hole? Extreamly dissapointed, Main-Deku just stared at Table-Deku wondering what to do next. Unfortunately, he was interrupted. 

"err, sorry to interrupt main-Deku, but do you want to date me? After all, you did just kill british-Deku. Who am i supposed to date now?" Slough-Deku said. Main-Deku was suddenly overcome by pure rage and flung table-Deku at slough-Deku. 

It was a direct headshot! And a double kill! Slough-Deku, having been smashed into by such a wonderfully solid and well-made table, was instantly killed. Table-Deku, having been smashed into by such a retarded idiot, was instantly obliterated into nothingness. Main-Deku was left alone, half-naked, in his alleyway.