𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫|| hoshi

||eleven||

this day, two years ago, i lost someone very dear to me. time flew by pretty slow without hana actually. especially with my hectic schedule.

today, i made sure to clear my schedule to visit hana's grave for her second death anniversary.

i parked my car and walked towards her grave. colorful flowers decorated her grave, making it lool more lively compared to the rest.

"many people remembered you, hana" i smiled and bent down. i placed the bouquet of poppies on her grave.

"i'm sorry i haven't been able to visit a lot, hana banana. my schedule has been so hectic. but hey, here i am"

my smile slowly faded and a glassy layer of tears formed in my eyes.

"i miss you hana" i whispered. "i wonder what life wohld have been like for both of us if i only loved you on time"

cold breeze suddenly hit my face, messing my blonde hair up.

i chuckled and fixed my hair. "i'm blonde now, hana. our albums have been such a success. if only you were here to celebrate it with me"

i felt liquid running down my cheeks. i didn't even notice i was crying. i quickly wiped my tears and smiled.

"sorry, hana. i know you don't like it when i cry"

i stood up and just stared at her grave. i noticed a girl putting flowers on the grave beside hana's. she radiated sad energy.

"who did you lose?" she asked me without looking at me.

i smiled sadly, "my bestfriend. who did you lose?"

"my boyfriend" she replied. "just three days ago"

"i'm sorry for your loss" i softly said.

she smiled and nodded. "thank you, hoshi"

my eyes widened and i looked at her. "you know me?"

"it doesn't take a fan much to recognize her bias. and you're not wearing a mask" she chuckled lightly. "don't worry, i'm not crazy. whatever you say will be kept with me and i won't tell anyone you're here. i'm grieving as well"

i sighed in relief.

thank God.

"what did he die of? if you dont mine me asking" i asked.

"he died of a car accident a week ago. he drove to my house to surprise me for my birthday" she said softly. "it's our anniversary today"

pain was evident in her voice. the pain was still an open wound for her.

"he's in a better place now" i smiled.

"how about your bestfriend?"

"she died of hanahaki.. because of me" i whispered the last part. "i then realized i loved her when it was too late"

"i'm sorry" she sadly said.

"i knew her since we were in fourth grade. i loved her so much" i chuckled and closed my eyes for a moment. i opened my eyes and faced her. "i'll tell you something that hasn't been exposed to the public"

"everything you've said to me hasn't been exposed to the public, hoshi" she laughed a bit. "tell me"

"my stage name hoshi came from her. she's the one who told me that i am a star that would never turn dull"

"have you moved on from her?" she asked.

i shook my head, "it's still her"

it always will be