Naruto AU One Shots!

The Jewel Thief (Pein x Konan) (Thieves AU)

The Jewel Thief 

When I wrote this I pictured Yahiko, rather than Pein, because he's alive and such, but it doesn't really matter. Feel free to picture whichever version you want. Either way, I just wanted to write a badass robber au with them as the pairing, so I did. Also: Bro™ Nagato is in the house. (And I'm livin for him).

Disclaimer: Probably violence and language.

AU: Heist!!! (In the modern world)

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An orange haired man flipped through the papers splayed messily about the coffee table. He didn't seem bothered by the disorganization. His eyes were too busy scanning the sheets of paper as if they contained the government's most prized secrets on them. His knee bounced rapidly as he read from his spot on the dusty and stained couch, the only piece of furniture in the entire warehouse besides the coffee table that held all of the papers. The rest of the room harnessed rows and rows of storage shelves, with boxes that ranged in size from some the that of a car to the size of a toe nail. The warehouse was quite large, large enough to hold an entire football field and still have room for the concession stand. Every once in a while the orange haired man would glance toward the emergency exit door with an anxious expression. His expression relaxed suddenly when a man with bright red hair entered through the door looking tired.

"Are you seriously going through those files again? You've already memorized them." The red haired man said as he walked toward the other.

"You can never be too sure." He replied. "Did you get the blueprints from Itachi?"

"No."

"Seriously!?"

"Dear God, Yahiko. What do you think this roll of paper in my hand is? Of course I have the blueprints."

"Fine, fine, I get it. Bring it here, Nagato."

Nagato did as he was told and brought the blue papers to Yahiko's hands. Yahiko scanned the blueprints just as quickly as he did the other papers and brought a wicked grin to his face. "Perfect." He said. "It's exactly like we thought. In just several hours, we'll be rich!"

Nagato rolled his eyes before joining his friend on the couch. "So, do you have our tickets for the party?"

"Yes, and the disguises."

"Oh, god almighty. I have to wear a tux?" Nagato complained.

Now it was Yahiko's turn to roll his eyes. "Yes, obviously. What did you expect, to sneak into this party dressing like the piece of shit you always look like? You'd be kicked out in seconds!"

"I know, I know. It's just that those stupid suits can't contain anything."

Yahiko shook his head. "Don't worry about it. I've already tested the tux with both the vest and the pistols, and they work fine."

"Nah man, I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about my dong."

Yahiko slapped his dear friend in the face as Nagato snickered. "Shut up, asshole. Just get your equipment ready and meet me down here in two hours."

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Promptly two hours later, both men stood in the same place as they last left each other, dressed to the nines but armed underneath. Their destination: The Hyuga Bank Co., where the biggest celebrity party of the year would be held, celebrating the transition of the company from the hands of Hiashi Hyuga to his daughter. It was said that Hinata Hyuga herself had a necklace stored in one of the vaults that is damn near priceless, worth even more than all of the cash deposits combined. And this precious necklace was the target of Yahiko and Nagato, or the "Akatsuki," as the media had come to know them by. Their third member, Itachi Uchiha, was an actual invited guest at the party, and would serve as the distraction for the evening. If you'd seen the Uchiha before, you'd pretty easily see how the man could be a distraction. He was drop dead gorgeous.