The last goodbye

chapter 5

the next morning i walk to training alone. my hands were shaking because of how nervous i was. when i walk in i look around. only to find a lack of people.

feeling slightly confused i move across to the knot tying station. after almost half an hour there i have managed to create almost all of the knots as well as introducing some of the ones the gladers taught me. the gladers. i missed them so much. i noticed the bow and arrow station was clear. i move across to it to try clear my mind. i stop before i even reach it. i couldn't. not yet any way.

instead i move over to the fire making station where beetee and wiress are trying but failing to make a fire.

i stand watching a moment before saying "you have to move your hands down quicker"

"what?" beetee asks

"may i?" i ask kneeling down beside him and nodding to the sticks.

he nods and i begin quickly starting the fire.

"where did you lean that?" he asks

"the glade" i reply "well. i knew how for my games but we never really needed it then"

he smiles slightly at that. i give them a small wave before moving away. i couldn't help but hope they died quickly. or i didn't have to kill them.

moving on i move to the snares station by myself. i get lost in my own world and only snap out of it when i hear someone throwing something at me. i move with what to most would be impossible speed and grab the pen someone had thrown at me before chucking it into my already made snare. the pen broke as soon as the snare clamped shut.

i don't look up as i change stations. i move to the trident station where finnick stands. having never thrown a trident before i watch him for a moment.

"how about i give you a lesson if you give me one for another station" he speaks up.

"how about no" i reply faking being angry.

"suit yourself firecracker. but don't say i didn't offer you anything" he replies "and if the only weapon is a trident"

i pick up the nearest trident weighing it in my hands. it felt like a top heavy spear from camp. i run through Clarisse's instructions. standing with one foot in-front of the other gripping the trident closer to the front before throwing it straight at the dummy piercing it directly where the heart would be.

"i think i'll be fine" i reply with a smirk before walking over to the archery station. he just made me so mad. he reminded me of gally. i can't help but smile at that. how would gally like to be compared to that pompous idiot.

i pick up one of the bows and after getting use to it i shoulder a quiver of arrows and enter the simulator. i take a deep breath and notch an arrow as it begins. the first simulation comes out of nowhere and instinctively i fire the arrow before quickly grabbing another. i duck as a spear flies towards me before letting the arrow loose hitting the thrower. i continue like this dodging and firing always hitting the simulations quickly before they could hit me. i take all my anger and frustration out on the simulation. my anger at being forced into another games. my anger at snow for torturing my friends. my anger at myself for being so stupid as to act the way i did and risk my friends safety.

by the time the simulation ends i have tears in my eyes. i didn't know where they had came from. i just knew it was my fault my friends were hurt.

i find the other tributes staring at me in surprise through the glass. exiting the simulation i place the bow down and quickly leave the training centre as the tears threaten to spill.

thankfully there wasn't much time before the end of training anyway so i head straight up to our level where i find haymitch already drunk.

"there she is" he slurs.

"you're drunk haymitch" i sigh.

"nicely noticed sunshine" he replies.

"you shouldn't be drinking" i reply grabbing the bottle from him and pouring it down the sink.

"and why not sweetheart" he growls.

"because you're not the only one that's hurting" i snap trying not to let the tears show. "you're not the only one that's lost someone they shucking love. you're not the only one that has been through a bloody hunger games. so quit feeling sorry for yourself because you're not alone"