tweek hates shopping

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Tweek was always a troublemaker.  His tics are a constant disturbance to his classes and he has picked a fight with at least three other boys. He has kicked Ned in the balls before and beaten Craig so hard he had to go to the hospital, but to be fair that fight ended with both of them in the hospital... It was a mutual beating. He fought all his classmates for Bebe once, he wasn't sure why but it was fun. He knows how to box! He's pointed a bazooka at Steven Spielberg for Christ's sake! 

So why are all the girls thinking he's some kind of feminine guy! He's just a guy who happens to like dudes that doesn't mean he's like those gay guys on Queer Eye! He's never liked anything feminine and to add into it! He hated his metrosexual phase, putting in so much effort into skin care! When he could've just splash water on his face and be done with it, but no! Craig and those guys needed him to lather his face in all these products.

He grumbled as Bebe wrapped an arm around his left arm pulling him away from the boys. Tweek looked at her and raised an eyebrow. "SO! Tweek we've been wondering since you're our gay best friend-" He always hated that term. "would you like to go shopping with me and Wendy! We're going after school!" Tweek loves his girl-friends. Don't get him wrong, but he HATES. shopping with them. They take forever to choose one outfit and it's a minefield with giving an opinion on the outfit! He winced and rubbed his neck. 

"Ohh... I'm sorry Bebe...I'm going to be really. really. REALLY. busy," He was lying. He had a free schedule, it was his day off from work."Maybe... ask Craig?" Tweek smiled apologetically without feeling sorry at all. Was it awful to throw his boyfriend under the bus like that? Yes. Does Tweek care that much? No, not really. Craig likes boring things and shopping is really...really boring. He was positive that Craig won't mind.

Bebe frowned. "Craig?" She scrunched her eyebrows together questioning Tweek's words. Tweek glanced back at his boyfriend, where Bebe moved her eyes to.

Craig was picking his nose and his chullo seemed to look stained with something. 

"Yep! Craig! He- He LOVES shopping." Tweek continued to lie, thanking his acting skills. Bebe seemed unconvinced. "Plus! Clyde's fashion sense? His fashion sense came from Craig. He gives GREAT advice!" It was actually Tolkien who convinced Clyde to put more effort in his outfits, but she doesn't need to know that.  

"If you say so.." Bebe still seemed unconvinced but she shrugged anyways. She walked past Tweek who let out a sigh of relief. The blond boy quickly escaped the hallway to go to his classroom. Hopefully Craig does enjoy shopping...

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Tweek was calmly arranging his lego pieces. He finally got the complex lego build he's always wanted! His parents, surprisingly, gave it to him for his 12th birthday and now he finally had time to build it. As he stacked the legos, he was in peace. So much in peace that he didn't hear the footsteps approaching behind him. 

"Honey." 

The monotone voice made the hair on his neck stand up and he jumped in his chair. "JESUS! ARGH!" His reflex of swinging his arm made him slam his lego structure onto his desk, destroying his progress. "CRAIG!" He screamed in agony as he turned around to meet his boyfriends eyes. "I WAS FINALLY ABLE TO-!" He stopped his rant noticing his boyfriends new appearance. 

Is Craig Tucker, the asshole who flips every teacher he has, the guy who speaks so flat and monotone that everyone thinks he has no emotions... wearing a hamster onesie?

Tweek blinked at his boyfriend. They stared at each other for a good minute, it seemed longer. The silence was broken when Tweek finally spoke. "What..?" 

Craig gave him the Craig special goofy grin, it surprised Tweek as he never sees Craig smile often since he got his braces. "It's amazing right, honey?" Tweek just snickered at him. Craig frowned immediately, "What are you laughing at, asshole." The blond just got up from his chair and hugged his boyfriend. 

"You! You're such a nerd, Craig." Tweek laughed. Craig pouted, smacking Tweek's back playfully. 

"You're the nerd. You play with legos." 

"Nu-huh and it's not playing its building!" 

"You sound like a gay nerd."

Tweek rolled his eyes and played with the flaps of the ears on the sides of the onesie.  "Where did you even find this?" 

"Bebe and Wendy took me shopping. I found it hidden away in a box." Craig explained putting his head on his boyfriend's shoulder. "We should go shopping more. We can find a lot of good stuff for stripe and us. Maybe we can go back and find a matching one for you." Tweek just laughed and nodded.

Maybe shopping wouldn't be so bad if Craig was there. 

"Plus I don't want to go through Bebe getting mad after I told her that brown and gray aren't good with each other again." Craig rolled his eyes. "Why are girls so difficult to shop with." 

"THAT'S ARGHH WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING!!" 

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a/n
i lied on the last chapter

this is the LAST one im giving you okay goodbye forever

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