INEFFABLE - chris miles

1x02 : two

"ok right everybody listen up" our english teacher said in the feeble attempt to get our attention "i'm going to be taking in your assignments today".

"why are you so relaxed about this" sid whispered to tony.

he shrugged his shoulders "so he's got your id card so what".

"so what, he's gonna cut his fucking bollocks off" i said from the other side of tony.

"thank you kai at least someone's taking this seriously" sid said, slightly having a dig at tony.

"chill out guys, i'm chilled right" tony replied, still not really giving a shit.

"why are you so chilled" sid demanded to know.

"because i'm confident and relaxed with my ability to improvise" tony gloated, earning a sigh from sid.

"because i'm going on a course for the rest of the week, and i'm not going to be here" i heard our english teacher say as i finally tuned back into what he was saying.

"also i didn't buy the drugs, you did" tony added.

i hit him on the arm "that doesn't fucking help him does it" i snapped, defending sid.

i felt quite sorry for sid, if someone asked me to describe sidney jenkins it would be in three simple words: tony stonems bitch.

honestly i don't think the boy had a backbone of his own but hey if he wants to be tony's bitch he can be my guest.

"guys, lo-look" our teacher spluttered "we've got a supply teacher coming in for next week, and in fact he's on his way up from the office to say hello".

"look there's 3,000 students in this college, he won't find you" tony said, finally giving sid some reassurance.

"yeah sid don't worry about it, everything will be fine" i added with a small smile.

"so if you give me your assignments, i promise that i'll have them marked for you by the um" the teacher lost track of what he was saying when the classroom door was opened "hi, uh can i help".

"supply teacher" the man said at the door.

i looked up to see a strange small man at the door.

"oh hi hi hi" our teacher jumped up from the desk he was sitting on "we really appreciate the short notice".

he turned to face us "everybody this is madison, uh madison..." our teacher was evidently unsure of this mans last name.

"twatter" the man announced, there were a couple of chuckles which our teacher attempted to die down "phd" madison added.

me, sid and tony all shared the same look of disbelief.

our teacher and madison engaged in a handshake that lasted far far too long with madison saying something about how teaching is a beautiful thing or something, honestly i wasn't really listening i was still in complete shock.

madison finally let go of our teachers hand when he informed him that he would not be starting next week and in fact he's already started.