INEFFABLE - chris miles

1x04 : two

i didn't even want to go to training. i wanted to be with chris because as far as telling me if he's all right i'd trust chris as far as i could throw him.

this training session must've been one of the worst in my life; my passes were short, my runs up the wing were a shambles and my marker was running rings around me.

"oliver" coach mickey shouted as we were all leaving "can i talk to you".

no prizes for guessing what this is about.

"you ok" he asked "you weren't being yourself out there today".

i shrugged "i'm fine guess i just wasn't having a good day".

mickey sighed "come on don't lie to me kid".

"i'm not lying" i told him, lying through my teeth.

"kai i've been training you now since you were first learning to kick a ball" he slightly chuckled "what's up with you".

"my mates going through something right now and i don't know if he's gonna be ok with it all" i told him.

he sighed and patted me on the shoulder "i'm sorry kid".

"it's just i'm scared he's not gonna tell me anything, whether he's just feeling a bit shit or on the brink of fucking suicide, i feel like he's not gonna talk to me and i don't know how to be there for him if he doesn't tell me shit" i blurted out with a single tear rolling down my cheek.

he pulled me in under his arm "hey come on now kid don't cry".

now i don't know about you but when someone tells me not to cry, i do the exact opposite and ball like a baby. and that's exactly what i did.

i started to sob into mickeys jacket. honestly, i don't think all the alcohol was out of my system because i never cry like this.

mickey just kept patting me on the back, giving me time to calm down a bit.

after about 5 minutes, which felt more like an hour, i managed to pull myself together.

i leant off him "sorry about your jacket" i sniffled.

he looked down at the two wet patches "ah it's fine, it's waterproof anyways".

"thanks mickey, really felt like i needed that" i smiled.

he smiled back "hey that's what i'm here for kid..now off you go, go live your young life to the fullest".

i chuckled whilst continuing to sniffle, i gave mickey one last smile before walking into the direction of the changing room.

</3

"hey chris" maxxie announced as we all walked into angies psychology classroom "trousers, how good are we".

after my somewhat mental breakdown with mickey i decided it was time for a bit of self care: i put my phone off, bought myself a face mask and some treats and watched the whole friends box set from start to finish.

when i went into college the next day everyone told me what happened, about chris being basically kicked out of his house by some random guy and how we walked through the streets of bristol and the college naked.