Mon Amour [Jenlisa]

Lifetime

I was so inlove with Jennie, so much that I decided not to confess. I was too scared that if she found out I would lose her. She was such a big part of my life that I never wanted her to disappear.

But that was my biggest mistake.

Because in the end I still lost her to someone else, because I didn't take that risk. I wish I did.

I wish I could go back and tell her how much she meant to me and how much I would love to wake up staring into those beautiful cat like eyes that I always got lost in. I wish I could tell her how much I wanted to wake up in the morning tangled with her and the white sheets.
I wish I could tell her how much I wanted to keep looking at the stars with her and count them while we planned our future.

But I didn't.

Instead I left.

I fistanced myself from her and left her all alone and the results hurt me more, because now she was getting married to my cousin, who was like a brother to me.

I knew he loved her too, but I never thought she would feel the same, and now that I found out that in a month's time they would be officially spouses, I was devastated.

I got an invitation card from Jongin himself, and when I got home he immediately kneeled infront of me and asked for forgiveness because he knew how much I loved her.

No.

I still do.

I love her so much.

But I couldn't get mad at him. I was given that opportunity to confess years ago but I didn't, so instead of getting mad I pulled him up and engulfed him into a tight hug saying that it was okay.

Even if it wasn't.

Because as long as she was happy and he was faithful. I was gonna let that marriage happen.

I looked him in the eyes,

"I'm proud of you Jongin. So proud because you were able to take the risk that I didn't because you weren't a coward like me. I want you to take care of her, tell her how beautiful she is everyday, cook breakfast for her from time to time because I would never get that chance anymore. I was her bestfriend, but that is where I only stand. You are her true love and I cannot change that. If she's happy then I am, if you're faithful then she's yours" He looks into my eyes as I do the same.

I could tell that he was inlove with her, and that he would continue to love her. He deserved her more than I did because he wasn't scared. I continue,

"Besides, she wasn't even mine to begin with" I flash a sad smile at him before he pulls me into another hug.

Now, tomorrow was their wedding day. I'd seen the preparations, I even saw Jennie's dress. I was told to sing at the reception and I knew what song I would sing to them.

My breath hitched as I suited up and wore my women's tuxedo. It was perfectly fit and Jongin made it customized for me. He was the sweetest cousin and I knew he would take care of her.

The bridesmaids, flower girls, ring bearer all walked down the aisle looking gorgeous and handsome. They looked at me with sad eyes knowing that the woman getting married today was the woman I was inlove with, and still inlove with today.

And now was the first time I would see her in years, because these past weeks I was ignoring her. Knowing that she would see hurt in my eyes, I avoided her.

Then slowly as I looked behind me the doors slowly open. Revealing her in a gorgeous white gown that hugged her body in the right places.

For a moment, our eyes met and her small eyes widen at the sight of me. Even with the veil infront of her face I could tell she grew onto a beautiful woman.