I Know What It's Like To Be Dead | Beatles Fanfiction

Chapter 16

Alexandra's POV
Shit. I turned around. "Hey Hannah. John had too many drinks, so I went to the bathroom with him to make sure he didn't get sick." I smiled and John was nodding. Hannah looked at him, shrugged and smiled. "Paul's waiting for you, it's almost time to leave." I nodded and walked over to where Paul was, leaving John behind.

I told myself I'd never kiss him again. Would I be able to keep myself to that?

July 15th

I was sitting in the backyard. I was all alone, enjoying the weather. Mum was out with some friends, dad was at work and Oliver was at his girlfriend's house. Paul was rehearsing with the Quarrymen.

Since the night of the party, me and John didn't kiss again. I was proud of myself, I knew I only loved Paul, and I didn't want to ruin our relationship because of John's sexual frustration. Well - or my sexual frustration. I didn't really know what I wanted. I really loved Paul, and god he was attractive, and I wanted my first time to be with him, but on the other hand, I didn't want him to see me without clothes.

The doorbell rang. I closed my book and got up from my chair, making my way through the kitchen and livingroom. I opened the door and couldn't believe my eyes.

John's POV
I ran as fast as I could. I had to find someone. Hannah was on holiday, and I didn't want Paul to see me like this. I ran towards Alex' house. The tears were rolling down my cheeks. I couldn't stop them.

I rang the bell and waited for someone to answer the door. as soon as Alex opened the door, her jaw dropped. I pushed my way in and closed the door. She looked at me.

"John.. wh-what's wrong, why are you crying?" I looked at her and sat down on the floor. she sat down next to me. "My mother -" I choked up, I was sobbing now and shaking. "She got hit by some fucking cunt in his car. And now she's gone." I was sobbing like a little baby by now.

Alex wrapped her arms around me, and rocked me from side to side. "sshhhh. I'm sorry." she whispered. "Let's sit on the couch." I nodded and got up. She held my hand and we made our way to the couch. She sat down and waited for me to sit down next to her. I lied down on the couch and put my head in her lap.

Alexandra's POV
I felt terrible. I was crying myself, I always got choked up if I saw other people crying. I stroked John cheek and played with his hair. "Sshh, it'll be alright John." He sat up and leaned against me. I put my head against his chest as he wrapped his arms around me. Hearing his heartbeat was relaxing. I looked up at him. I leaned up and placed a kiss on his cheek. I felt sorry for him. I knew Julia too. Everyone knew her. She was a ray of sunlight.

Me and John just sat there for a while, until someone rang the bell. I got up, opened the door and it was Paul. I gave him a quick kiss and whispered "John's here". Paul nodded and got inside. John got up and walked towards Paul, they hugged each other and I could hear John sob. "She's not coming back, is she?" Paul was quite for a second before he answered. "I'm sorry John."

I sat on the couch as tears rolled down my cheeks.