Till The Count Of Five ✓

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

You're not a follower, you're a rogue in making.

Kiara

23th April 2019, Tuesday
14:30

A smile could mess up one's head badly and leave behind a tangled mess of earth-shakening breaths and exaggerated thoughts. I needed a break but a glance at his animating hands changed my mind. I was supposed to grieve and feel exhausted after spitting out Shay to Roy.

"I don't know much," Nolan said. "But he was rude. That was so rude."

I shrugged, looking at Vee's car that drove off in the distance. "Thank you. But I should get going."

"Are you crying?" he asked and brushed the tip of his nose.

My eyebrows rose. "No." I wiped the area underneath my eyes.

He shrugged. "You're flushed."

Did glistening eyes count for tears? Or could he see the dried remains from fifteen minutes back?

"I'm fine. I should go home. Thank you," I said and tucked at my skirt.

The sunlight hit his face and highlighted those curls that just made things more difficult. I noticed a small scar near his ear, the one he had mentioned once to his friend while I had been clearly eavesdropping.

"Kiara."

I blinked and shook my head. "Sorry, I lost the track of what you were saying." When I lifted my eyes, I hated how the anger inside me was vanishing.

"I asked if you came by yourself, because the buses are gone," he said.

I shrugged. "I'll walk." Over his shoulder, I could see his car and the driver inside.

"Isn't it too hot for that?" He followed my gaze. "Can I drop you home?"

My head snapped up and I tried to form a reply. My mouth opened and I inhaled, realizing I didn't really have many options as an answer.

"No, it's fine. I don't want to burden you." That was the most diplomatic reply I could think of.

"Oh," he said with a tinge of disappointment. I was taken aback and wondered if he was disappointed or if it was another eccentric thought of mine.

I looked at my shoes and shut my eyes. One and a half years, and all I could do was stutter. Well, there went my confidence. I sighed and did the only thing I could do at the moment.

"I'm sorry," I stated truthfully, lifting my gaze. "I'm just– It's–"

"Excruciating, it's fine," he said with a smile.

I smiled back. "Thank you, by the way. Back in the ground, you helped the kid."

He shrugged and pointed at the school gates. "I should probably go."

I nodded as he walked to his car. What was wrong with me? What, in the name of God, was I doing? A crow flew over my head and I turned to the school building, the closed windows of Ash's class a brutal brutal reminder. All my fault. All of it.

My fingers clenched and called his name. "Nolan." He turned. "Is your offer still up?"

"Sure," he said and I jogged up to him. "Are you sure you're fine? You're pale and flushed at the same time. How's that even possible?"

I shook my head. He had no idea what all was possible, no idea that sometimes contrasting emotions mixed up awfully. Contrasting people mixed up awfully. We'll get to it. I promise, we'll do it soon, I told myself.