Till The Count Of Five ✓

Chapter 49

Chapter 49

We don't mean it. We don't mean most of the nasty things we do, yet we do them because we simply want to lose for a moment and take pleasure in their pain. Or because it is a necessity.

Kiara

15th May 2019, Wednesday
19:20

I was enraged by everything that was happening. Half of me wanted to tell everything to Vee. The other half was scared to lose him.

My hands tightened around the door knob and I strolled through the room, heading directly for the bathroom.

"You asked me if you were a coward," Vee said. "I think now, you're everything you weren't before."

I gripped the sink and looked up at my face. I saw Nolan's, his frown and disappointment in me. I wanted to tell him he was no one that I should be pleasing him, waltzing into my life a month ago did not make me answerable to him. All lies. I did not have to bother myself because of what he thought but it bothered me, because he was right. Just like Vee. I sighed. So what, if I thought I'd give this party a shot? So what, if I was foolish enough to spiral back to her birthday? I knew it when I had stopped in front of the house. The crowd that came in and out had been enough to scare me, but not my stubbornness. I thought it was okay. Now that you're here, just stick to it.

The door opened and I shut my eyes. It wasn't his fault. Maybe I should go and say sorry to him. Of course, it wasn't his fault, or mine.

"Kiara?" Mehak called.

I turned around. "What are you doing here?"

"I saw you run and you looked really upset. Is everything fine? You scared Vicky."

He still cared about me. I couldn't let him go.

"What is that?" She bent down to pick a paper.

Shit.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

That was Shay's note.

Her eyes widened. "Kiara?"

I reached for the paper but she stepped back.

"Does Vicky know about this?"

I paused.

"For God's sake, Kiara! You didn't show him this."

"I was scared," I muttered.

She shook her head, taking a step back.

"Give me the paper, Mehak."

"He needs to see this."

I began walking towards her. She reached for the door. Confused and scared, I pulled her back.

I just pulled her back but she lost her balance.

Her face changed from surprise to horror. She stumbled backwards, her right leg intertwining with her left and that caused her to fall. Her head hit the edge of a table.

My eyes widened as I watched her head fall to a side over her shoulder, her fingers leave the note and her eyes shut. She said nothing after that, no smiles or disgust or anything. Just plain silence, the kind that rose from a graveyard. I shifted on my feet, unsure of my own trembling hands. My feet wobbled as I approached her.

"Mehak," I mumbled and shook her. I was disgusted when I picked up the note but desperate at the same time. "Mehak, get up."

She didn't move. I sucked in a breath and touched her head to move her. I didn't feel her hair. Rather I felt something wet and sticky. Worms, rotten, parasitic, innocent. Her chest rose in a steady motion and I knew I should be calling someone for help but I couldn't move. They moved between my fingers and dropped to the floor. Red worms.

The door opened. "Kiara?"

My head whipped in the direction and I stared at Nolan. "I - she fell an..and I-"

He stepped in, his gaze flickering from Mehak to me. Then, his mind registered the page in my hand.

"She was going to show it to Vee. I pulled her back. Sh-she fell."

He said nothing. His eyes were focused on Mehak and the blood that spread in the room but he seemed elsewhere. After a staggered step towards us, his lips moved in an inaudible murmur.

"Nolan-"

"I understand, Kiara." His tone, his I know this voice that cracked at the end made me step back, unsure of him and myself.

He tried to touch her head but I stopped him. "Don't." I didn't want to see him in blood because of me, like Vee. I was a horrible person, wasn't I? Yet it did not feel that wrong. She was breathing, Ash wasn't.

"Mehak?" I froze at Hardik's voice.

Nolan looked up at Hardik who stared at him in horror. I looked between the two of them. The note slipped into my pocket and I walked to Hardik. He noticed the blood on my hands and the sweat on Nolan's forehead. I was more composed than Nolan.

"What happened?" Hardik asked, slouching next to Mehak.

"Hardik–" Nolan started.

"She came up to check on Kiara. What happened to her?"

"It's my mis–"

"We just came here," Nolan said. "Kiara and I were on the terrace. We heard her scream and ran here."

I couldn't believe my ears. Nolan was lying. For me. Tears welled my eyes.

"Get someone, Nolan," Hardik said.

Nolan grabbed my wrist to pull me away but I stopped.

"It's my fault," I said. "This is all my fault. I pulled her back and she fell."

Hardik's head snapped up. "What?"

"It was a misunderstanding, Hardik," Nolan said.

"Stay out of this, Nolan. What did you do?" I stepped back. "What did you do?" His loud voice tremors through my body.

"I didn't mean it. It was an accident."

He pushed me back.

Nolan tried to hold him back but he was faster. His hands wrapped around my neck and he pushed me into the wall. I winced, thinking back to last summer when he had been suspended for a week for beating a guy in the school premises. I remembered laughing because he did not seem that strong. I took back what I had said.

"Hardik, leave her." Nolan tried to push his hands off my neck. "Hardik, leave."

Hardik grunted when Nolan shoved him away. He lost his balance for a second but was quick to recover. I moved to a side, away from him and towards the window. It seemed like a bad choice when he pushed Nolan away and came at me. I saw him clench his fingers and braced myself to receive the blow. It never came. Nolan stepped in and pushed him to a side, to the window, out of the window and I screamed in horror, my palm over my mouth.

"Nolan–" I stared out of the window. People were beginning to gather around. Someone called Pankaj.

"You need to leave," I said and grabbed his hand. He tried to look over the window but I tucked at his shirt. "You have to leave."