Till The Count Of Five ✓

Chapter 38

Chapter 38

We're all the same, all dead and alive, crying on a shoulder we decided to abandon.

Kiara

13th May 2019, Monday
7:40

"You should've given it to me earlier." She went through the pages, to print which I took so much trouble, exactly the kind I avoided. A dead girl's note, for example.

"Earlier when? Sunday?" I snapped.

She gave me a cold glare before turning back to the papers. "What did you do with the pen drive?"

Fed it to your dog. "I gave to Sameer. Now if you think I can leave, may I go?" I said through gritted teeth.

She smirked. "Where's your sass, Kiara?"

In the same drawer where Nolan placed Shay's note and left it on me to decide whether police should see it or not.

Clearly now that she was done, I pulled the door to leave. My mind was numb. I barely felt anything in the past two days. I ate, slept, took a bath, did everything a human did except feel. Roy offered me again to read the note. I told him not to call me again. She explicitly mentioned you, he had said, saying she needed me. I told him I didn't care. I lied. It hurt so much to even think, to open my eyes and see the mess. Half of me was curious. Did the note mention an apology or was it a blame note? Did she know we cared or did she think otherwise? I told myself it did not matter. She was gone.

I was tensed about the note, about Nolan's silent but sad eyes. He called yesterday. I didn't pick up. I kept my distance from my phone since Saturday, trying not to call Vee and hear his broken voice. Nolan did not have to say it. I knew I was to be blamed for Shay's condition when it was her twisted mind that propelled her to jump.

The school suffocated me with its paint and vibrant staff, with the huge television screen in the centre of the reception that somehow just managed to show you the campus in thirty seconds and repeated the slide like some tape. It suffocated me because it reminded me of how Shay must have felt. I did not feel good about her accident, much to my own surprise. The air the news knocked out of my lungs when returned back was poisoned. And the poison still remained in my system.

I paused outside the reception and blinked at Vee. When he turned around, his surprised gaze met mine. I looked around for a hiding spot and found none.

"Hey," he said and walked up to me.

I nodded slightly. "Good Morning." It was really a good morning, not even close. So I said what I thought would put a little weight off my shoulders. "I'm sorry."

His lips moved into a frown.

"I..." A sigh left my lips and I stood there dumbfounded.

"Stop, please. Don't blame yourself."

"What if she does?" I asked. I knew she did. It was her gift to me.

"Did Roy call you too?" he asked.

I laughed. "I was right there when they saw. The print got mixed up with my sheets. But I didn't read it, not past the first line. Did you?"

His sober, straight nod gave me relief. I knew reading it would provide me relief.

"It didn't look like a suicide note. If you see the previous one and this one, you'll see she wrote them after some point. The first one, I believe, is written before even August. We're right in that one but in the second one, it shows." He paused.