The Broken Mirror

Chapter 10: Flashback- Two Sided

"What are you talking about?" Benjamin snapped in response to my accusation.

"What do you mean what am I talking about?" I replied with the same amount of poison in my voice as the first time. "Who have you been seeing? Don't try to tell me no one because in that case we'd both know full well thats not true."

"Who have I been seeing?" He questioned, not sure that he heard my question right.

"Yes!" I snapped yet again. I am not very pleased right now with him and if he keeps this up he's going to end up with a fork in his throat, or another sharp object. You better watch your mouth boy, because you've never seen what I am capable of dishing out.

"If you seriously think that I would cheat on you then you don't know me," Benji said. "I was so thankful to have even met you and you accept me instead of ditching me just like any and every other woman who even appeared to be slightly like those in the popular crowd. You didn't reject me like most people would, and you haven't used me at all and you will never understand how thankful I am for that. I would never fuck up our relationship because I've spotted another girl I want to get to know. I wouldn't even attempt to do that because you would fuck me up so badly and I'd get nowhere with anybody else because of the guilt that I would carry around with me." Benji's confession was actually quite sincere, despite the few pieces of profanity that appeared in his words. No matter how much I wanted myself to believe this and end this little fight now, there was one part of my conscious that wouldn't allow me to.

At first, I wasn't able to figure out why the hell I wasn't able to just accept what Benji had told me, but as soon as I questioned myself, a memory very similar to my current situation came to the forefronts of my mind.

Quite a few years ago when I was in high school, my first 'boyfriend', it's complicated, pulled off something quite similar to this. One day when I met up with him I was quite suspicious about the red smudges around the collar of his shirt. He, Zachary, proceeded in saying that his sister might have accidentally smudged some of her ruby red lipstick on it. After that, he went on saying about how lucky he was to be with me and that he would never play games with me. Guess what? This instance happened again, but with some even more goodies added to it! It wasn't just the red lipstick, which there were even more traces of, but there was also the smell of his cologne mingling with another, one that was very fruity smelling. Everyone knows that I hate perfume and knows that I think applying deodorant a few times a day is much more effective, as well as less expensive, so it sure as hell wasn't mine. He attempted, and was able, to sway me into thinking that as a prank his younger sister took their mothers mother's perfume and mixed some with his own cologne. I can't believe I actually bought that. I asked him about the lipstick, as you could imagine, and he came up with another lame excuse off the top of his head and I took it as the truth once again. It was the third encounter when I saw the very same lipstick smeared all over his cheek and on the side and back of his neck when he had pulled the last straw. If I wasn't worried about a criminal record I swear I would have murdered him with his own tie.

"I swear on my grandmother's grave that I would never do something like that to you," Benji stated. That was a very strong statement but there was still that part of me that wouldn't let me believe him, no matter how much I wanted to, there was always something holding me back from truly believing him. "The first time we met I told you that I would never lie to you, because being lied to absolutely fucking sucks," He said, this being nothing but true, especially when it applied to things bigger than 'does this article of clothing make my butt look big?'. "I've been lied to before and it has totally crushed me and I would never want to put this feeling onto another person, especially when they never deserved it, so I vowed to never lie to anyone." It took me awhile to soak this all in, and was still left a little confused even after I mulled over his words multiple times.

"You mean so much to me Alynne and I just can't believe we're getting into an argument like this," I heard him almost whimper under his breath. In all honesty, I couldn't either. I couldn't believe that the both of us, who have been in a relationship that was seemingly perfect, ended up not being. Life just felt the need to throw us a fucking curveball now, didn't it? "Half the time you're my reason for living so it would be dumb of me to actively do something that would shit on our relationship. By hurting you I'd be killing myself." His eyes were now starting to glimmer. I then realized that they were freshly produced tears coming out of their habitat and deciding to spill. Oh no, what have I done?

No Alynne, don't blame yourself. You've picked up the smell of perfume on him and the last time you were in a circumstance, shit went south real fast then and you damaged almost beyond repair so you're only being protective and defensive so you don't go down that road again.

"Then why is the smell of perfume on you?" I questioned, almost about to start crying myself. The sight of Benji crying tears of sadness was very disheartening for me because I've never seen him cry because of that. I've seen tears of joy and tears caused by laughing too hard at something that he probably found funnier than it actually was, but never ones spilt of sadness.

"Is this what this is about?" He returned. I nodded my head slowly. "Oh Alynne, I'm sorry for not having told you this earlier. I give guitar lessons to children at the recreational center and the mothers drop their kids off when they go to run errands. The perfume and fragrances that they have on almost always get onto my clothes somehow."

"I'm sorry," I apologized, hoping it wasn't too late to just drop all of this and forget that it ever even happened. "I didn't know."

"I know you didn't," Benji said in a faint tone of voice. "I should have told you earlier." Before I know it, I'm tugged over in his direction and enveloped in his arms, having been pulled into an embrace.

"Can we just forget that this fight ever happened?" I asked. "I would really like that because this was all just a big misunderstanding."

"I'd like that too."
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I quite liked writing this chapter. I wrote the first two paragraphs this morning and I was quite proud of them then, having been able to start the chapter in the heat of the moment. I hope this was okay.

A shoutout to MonkyingAround for helping me out with this. I was clueless about what Alynne's purpose for not being able to accept Benji's confession and while in a conversation with her I came up with it! Thanks a bunch to you if you're reading this, Lauren.

I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter and that you'll tell me what you think in whatever method you prefer. Feedback is always appreciated! :)