NCT 22ND Member

ι ωαηηα єη∂ ιт

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ᴛʜɪs ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ɪs ʙᴀsᴇᴅ ᴏɴ ᴀ ᴛʀᴜᴇ sᴛᴏʀʏ ᴏғ ᴍɪɴᴇ , ɪᴛ ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴs sᴇʟғ ʜᴀʀᴍ ᴀɴᴅ sᴇʟғ ʜᴀᴛᴇʀᴇᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴏxɪᴄ ᴀᴄᴛs ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʀɪɢɢʀɪɴɢ ғʟᴀsʜʙᴀᴄᴋs ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴜɴᴄᴏᴍғᴏʀᴛᴀʙʟᴇ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ɪᴛ .

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Cherry pov

The loud voice of chatting was ringing in my head I felt dizzy as I recalled what they were saying the , only friends I have left after my friend passed away accusing me for her death , every single comment they made was like a sharp knife stabbing my heart I didn't know that hanging out with my old friends will lead me to feel disgusted of myself , I felt empty and angry with everything I did in my life and I don't remember a good memory to make me smile thinking about life worth infront of the hate I receive from people is a joke to me everything I have ever did in my life fired back to me sometimes I wish I knew what I did in my past life to receive this much of hate and pain

My phone light up from a message Taeyong send me , telling me they went out for dinner without me

The feeling of the soft mattress hit me after I laid on bed with my mind filled with thoughts

Am I really worth living?
If I left they will forget about me in fourth months .
My death won't affect anyone they will feel better without me , NCT won't receive hate , my father will get a rest
It is not like I will become something important in the future , every one say our future is bright but why I see my future burning.

My eyes landed on the open bathroom door I took small steps until i looked infront of the mirror and I didn't even recognize who am i , my eyes landed on the sharp object in the cabinet I didn't realize what I did until I saw my hands dripping blood from my elbow to my wrist

I washed it with water and didn't mind warping my wrist the boys won't notice I have filming tomorrow for my solo comeback I will be gone for a month or two to film the mv .

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sorry for being emo dealing with a toxic sibling really drives me crazy i used to run away from my brother by hanging out with my friends but now we are face to face all day