What happened in Beihone [ under revision ]

8 - Feelings

JELLY

I was sitting on one of the benches here at school since that day at Mr Canavough's class ay hindi na uli kami nagusap ni Butter. But everything went back to normal, I go to my usual classes and sometimes hang out with Dana.

On the other hand Butter and Jillian started hanging out again. Because of what happened, naging okay na silang dalawa. Was it my fault for how things are turning out right now? Or tama lang siguro to prevent myself from hurting Butter and my sister Jillian.

I don't know maybe life will always find a way to fucked us up huh.

"Hello there stranger." Dana said at umupo siya sa tabi ko, holding a drink she bought from starbucks.

"Hi Dana!" I said and I smiled at her, sure Dana has restrictions pero she has been by my side for the past few days.

"Typical scene from a movie of having a dramatic breakdown here at the bench." She chuckled and went for a sip at her drink.

"I am not Dana okay?" I said that as a lie, so she won't bother me again about the problem I have.

"You see Jelly, transparent ka kasi that's why I know if you're lying. Come on! Spill the beans." Tumingin sa akin si Dana as if she's reading what's on my mind at umiwas naman ako ng tingin sa kanya.

"I don't have any beans to spill, let it pass Dan." I said and I stared blankly at people who were still there hanging out.

"It's about Butter isn't it????? I know the both of you like each other so why not date???" Nagulat naman ako sa sinabi nito and I covered her mouth immeditiately.

"Don't you ever say that in public Dana!! Jillian likes Butter and if this comes out, it will really do no good." Kinuha ko na ang mga kamay ko at umupo uli ng maayos. There was a minute of silence for the both of us.

"I actually had the idea of being your fake girlfriend so the both of you can confess to each other but now, someone is at stake and it's someone really close to you. I get that Jell, thing is it's going to be long before Jillian confesses and she will be rejected by Butter." Tumayo naman si Dana at pumunta sa basurahan to throw out her drink and she sat beside me once again.

"So what are you pointing out?" Tanong ko sa kaniya, kasi hindi ko alam kung bakit niya sinabi to.

"All I'm saying is, if she's going to be hurt why not with one go. Eventually Butter's going to reject her for you and if she already knows about it mas lalo siyang masasaktan diba?" Dana explained, pero sa totoo lang ay tama rin naman siya but am I really ready to hurt my sister my bestfriend and the person I get to be with all my life?

"It doesn't have to be like this." I said and leave a big sigh.

"It's always going to be like this, kahit anong gawin mo Jelly someone get hurts, reality of life." Dana said at katulad ko ay naka tingin rin siya sa kawalan, it's that eyes of her have no life.