The Blackout ⤖ George Russell

T H I R T Y T W O

Nora leaned against the kitchen counter, she was observing the huge never-ending landscape outside. Lost was not the right word to use now, perhaps disorientated was better to use to describe how Nora felt. The conversations the family had were all about the new F1 season, what was about to start. How much Nora wanted to be excited as well, she couldn't be excited. This year's season was just a disaster to her; she lost her seat, she was still recovering from an accident, her friends were able to be part of F1 and George.

She blinked a few times and sighed. A part of her was feeling okay, the other part was feeling guilty towards George. And they weren't even together, but yet Nora kissed Ben. It didn't mean anything to her, but it happened.

Ben pulled back after a while. "We can't..."

"I know," she whispered and looked away. For some reason, it needed to happen to Nora, she needed to kiss Ben.

Ben knew Nora was in a confusing situation, and he only judged this situation as a friend. Mistakes happen. He pulled her back in a hug and kept silence. It didn't mean anything to him, but he didn't feel awkward as well. This was a kiss what happened, with no meaning, and from now on: move on. 

It felt wrong. And it was a huge mistake what needed to be forgotten ASAP.

And the odd part was that she and Ben never felt awkward about it. They kissed, processed it, and they continued with their life. The separation between doctor and friend became more prominent, but Nora and Ben knew they had found a friend for life.

Nora got sucked out of her mind when Aubrey entered the kitchen; she was making noise, and her presence was just annoying.

"Hello," Aubrey friendly said and opened the refrigerator to get something to drink.

Nora stood up straight. "Hmm," she hummed uninterested.

"George just arrived in Australia, he doing some interviews today." 

Not forget to mention that Aubrey is a closer friend to George than Nora ever was. For the last few weeks, Aubrey and George's friendship seemed to be tight, really close.

Nora walked away from Aubrey, and she left the kitchen. She swallowed hard and ran both her hands through her hair when she moved towards the living room.

"He showed the track, it looks pretty cool."

It was hard for Nora to not sneer at Aubrey. She balled her fists and squeezed hard in them.

Aubrey followed her to the living room. "Even though he is on the other side of the world, I feel like I'm still there. Maybe you should call him, it will do him good."

"Aubrey, fuck off, please!" Nora hissed and sat down on the couch. She let out a deep sigh, and she opened her book; it was getting too much for Nora.

Aubrey was silence for a moment, processing the hiss of her bigger sister. She was done with it, all those odd and off sneers of Nora. "What is it with you? Since you are back home, even in the hospital, you act so...off. Like I have done something wrong. Did I do something wrong?!" Her voice raised, and she pointed at Nora. "Because if I did, let me know what I have done wrong, Nora! I can't guess it!"

"You just don't see it, do you?" Nora sneered and refused to look up from her book. "You have done enough, Aubrey. You're like an itchy sweater; always a pain in the arse."

"Like what? What have I done?!" Aubrey was yelling now. "I have been nice to you for a long time, extremely nice. But you don't have the fucking rights to treat me like a piece of shit, Nora. You have given me so much anxiety that I could start my own train company: The Anxiety Express. And this is the thanks I get? Maybe you should fuck off, Nora. Maybe you shouldn't have woken up!"

The last sentence made Nora look up, and this time not with a smile. Nora lowered her eyebrows. "All you do is care about yourself, don't you? Did I ask for help? Did I ask for it, huh? No, I did not. Go sit in the same car as I did, and you will know what it is like to be in my situation. Oh, wait, maybe you should transform into me," she sneered and got up from the sofa. While breathing heavily, she walked over to her little sister. "Because you want to be me, you want to copy me. Maybe then you will understand me."

With that being said, Nora passed Aubrey and walked towards the hallway, she didn't want to be around Aubrey anymore; not now and not later.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!"

She really didn't get it. Nora tightened her jaw and shook her head in disbelieve, unbelievable.

"Talk to me, Nora! Why would I copy you?" Aubrey crossed her arms in front of her chest and kept having her eyes on Nora, who turned around now. They were facing each other now. "Why would I want to be you?"

"For starters; you want my career because you didn't make it. You want to be me because I am better than you are. You want my friends. Because every bloody time when my friends are around, you steal the show, or you keep having contact with them behind my back. And let's not start on the men I like, because that is something else on a whole different level."

Aubrey frowned. "That is not true."

"It is Aubrey! It is that bad because you refuse to even see it!"

She shook her head. "I think you're high on medicine," Aubrey casually replied. A fake smile curved on her lips. "Maybe we should calm down, shall we?" Her voice was soft and had a sweet tone, exactly how a bitch would act. She put her hand on Nora's arm and pointed at the sofa.

"Jesus Christ," Nora said. "You're the worse of them all." Her voice cracked, and tears filled her eyes. "You know what, Aubrey. Keep thinking I'm high on medicine all the time, keep acting like you care. Sooner or later, you will find out what I mean, and you will fall hard. And I will let you fall, I will let you down. Keep my friends, say hi from me. You might say hi to George as well because you can keep him!"

Something changed in Aubrey like she suddenly understood why Nora was acting off. "What has George to do with this?" Her voice was soft, it was almost like she was scared.

"Because you bloody like him!" Nora yelled. The tears kept welling up in her eyes. "And he likes you too," she brokenly said. "He's been here so often lately, and he wasn't here for me. I have barely seen him while he was here because he was with you. I can see how you look at him, how he looks at you. You are so flirtatious, teasing all the time, you talk about him all the time. And I totally get what you mean because he's amazing; there's hiding a funny boy behind his seriousness and shyness, he's the most gorgeous person I've ever met...I mean, look at his eyes, look at his face, look at him. I can write a novel about him." Her voice became softer. The first lonely tear rolled over her cheek, followed by a second one. "Because I'm in love with him. And nothing hurts more than seeing him falling in love with my own sister." She was hurt, saying those words hurt her. There wasn't a feeling to describe what it felt like to say those words.

Aubrey looked down and parted her lips. All the air was sucked out of her lungs. Her mind stopped working. She suddenly didn't know how to act or react anymore. If she didn't respond, she knew what it looked it to Nora. Aubrey had seen Nora before with a broken heart, but this didn't even was close to that previous heartbreak, this was a whole new level heartbreak.

"No, Nora-"

"It's fine, Aubrey. I wish you to be happy. And go for it, don't let a boy like him slip through your fingers." The smile on Nora's lips was fake, what was expected.

Aubrey shook her head. "He loves you, Nora. Not me, but you." The attention came back. Nora looked at her sister. "He is madly in love with you, that it isn't healthy anymore. All he can do is talk or think about you." Aubrey had a small smile on her face. "You are in love with him, and he is in love with you and it is a goddamn tragedy because you look at him and see the stars, he looks at you and sees the sun. And you both think the other is just looking at the ground, but...George...he..."

"What?" Nora whispered confusedly.

"George is madly in love with you."