Not What You Wanted • Ben Solo | Kylo Ren

Kylo

(A/N: get ready for some ben pov)

Rey wouldn't remember much from that night. All she could recall was the seemingly fantastic evening she had with Ben, even being sealed with a kiss before it all went to hell.

When Bazine said she was his girlfriend... that's when Rey's senses started to fade. She didn't hear him calling her name as she walked away from the scene as fast as she could, she didn't feel the countless tears falling from her red cheeks and she barely felt herself slip away from Ben's grasp before bolting.

She didn't know where her legs were taking her and frankly she couldn't give less of a shit. All she needed was to get the hell out of there. Away from Bazine, away from Ben.

After about twenty minutes of walking, she felt her phone buzz in her back pocket repeatedly. She didn't need to check it to know it was Ben. Who else would text or call at this hour? It could be Poe, she supposed, but didn't want to take the chance of seeing the message and feeling obligated to respond.

Without going to the messages app, Rey turned off her phone and hailed a taxi since her feet hurt so bad that they were numb. The temperature in Chicago wasn't exactly warm at night either, not to mention she had no clue where she was; it'd take ages to get home by foot.

She held her tears back in the cab to save herself from looking like some naive little girl who just had her heartbroken. The bad thing... that's exactly what she was. All this time she believed him to be different, and now she knew. Now she knew she'd never find a guy who deserved her. The hardest part was that's he liked him beyond words. More than she'd ever felt for anyone in her life and of course he had to fuck it all up. She should've known this would happen.

Rey could've cried of happiness at the sight of her complex, just because she desperately needed to let everything out. Mostly tears and maybe some words she'd never be bold enough to say to his face.

So when she bolted to her apartment, slamming the door, she did just that. The four walls of her bedroom watched as she collapsed onto the bed and sobbed into the pillows, muffled curses escaping her lips between heavy breaths.

She stayed like that for a while, until she succumbed to her tiredness and fell asleep.

Her dreams were dominated by Ben.

———

Pain was all Ben felt as he watched the girl he'd come to be so fond of slip further and further away from him. If Bazine was speaking, he wasn't listening. The sound of his heart breaking was too loud to sense anything else.

He called her name when he could barely see her, but she only faded deeper into the shadows of the night.

It was only when he couldn't see her anymore that he registered that he just had her here, in his arms. He'd give a lot to bring her back here and press his lips to her one more time. Oh fuck, her lips. No fancy dish at any restaurant could top the taste of her mouth.

One moment she was here and the next... just gone.

He balled his hands into fists as he turned to see Bazine, the devilish smirk still resting on her makeup-caked face.

"Well, guess she won't be sticking around."

Ben saw red. His jaw clenched so tight that he'd be surprised if he didn't crack a tooth. You couldn't see it in the night, but his eyes grew dark and hardened on her.