Personal War

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If I were to close my eyes, I would be there. I would feel the heavy armor covering my body that's sweating like a pig underneath. I could smell the rubble and the burning of flesh in the air. Dust filled my throat.

"It was dangerous, but us even being there in Iraq was dangerous. For about three minutes, everything was going fine, until I missed a building. I thought we already swept it, but we hadn't. If I had, I would have found three ISIS members with a bomb in hand. I could've shot the guys, disabled the bomb, and saved my team. Instead, they threw the bomb as we were regrouping. My whole team died, blown to bits in front of my eyes. Blood everywhere, but the deaths were swift and clean. I was the only one breathing when the three members came to check."

Haven starts to sob over her food, and her husbands are quick to comfort her.

"I can stop."

She shakes her head violently and asks me to continue.

"They raped me, right there in the dirt. I tried to fight them off, I did, but they eventually won. I could usually take three men down, but I was almost blown to smithereens and I just lost my family. The closest thing I had to a real family. Then they, me stark naked, grabbed me and took me to their warehouse building that was based about ten miles away from our military hideout. Turns out that they had been tracking us for a while, without our knowledge of course."

I gulp loudly, remembering the intimate details of everything they did to me. The way they touched me, beat me, tortured me for information. Information I would not give. I would rather die than give up that information. To this day. No matter if I'm in the military or not.

"They tortured me, raped me, touched me, beat me, whipped me for ten months. They were trying to gain information that I had and you can't know. I never gave anything up. Nothing they wanted at least. I was able to escape one night after they accidentally left the window unlocked. I climbed out and ran. I stole guns and food and money in order to get back to home base."

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