Enamored by Darkness: The Chronicles of Clerion Collins

I|Simula

Beginning

"Come on, Alyana! Don't be so slow! We need to hurry!" Mom shouted as she saw me still lying in bed while she was all dressed up and ready to go. I stretched my arms before getting up from bed and headed to the bathroom, carrying my towel and clothes for the trip. I quickly took a shower without needing Mom to remind me.

After getting dressed, I went straight to the mirror and fixed myself. I applied a little powder and brushed my hair. I didn't really need to look perfect, especially since we were taking a bus to Cebu. Mom didn't want to take a plane because she was afraid we might crash or sink into the sea. Truthfully, she just had a fear of heights, as if there was no danger of drowning on this boat we were on. Tsk!

While Mom was afraid of heights, I had a fear of water. I was afraid of seas, oceans, and anything that could drown me. It was because I had a phobia ever since I almost drowned in the river below Pagsanjan Falls. I even almost appeared on TV because of that incident. Thankfully, we left before the reporters arrived. I was only ten years old then, and that's why I have such a deep fear of water, except when I take a bath. I'm a clean person, so sometimes I really spend a long time in the bathroom.

I hastened my pace as Mom shouted again, looking extremely impatient. Tsk! Why did I have to be such a wanderer!

By the way, we're going to visit my father today. He and Mom are separated, so we're living in different houses now. I'm their only child, so they don't have anyone to share their time with. It's all mine, but of course, I didn't want to grow up in the province, so I chose to live in Manila with my mom instead of staying with Dad in Cebu.

I'm from Mandaue City, Cebu, but I really prefer Manila. That's where I grew up. I was still a child when Mom and Dad separated, so we only talked through chats or video calls. It was difficult at first, but eventually, I got used to the situation and just went with the flow of what was happening.

Now Mom is taking me to Cebu, and we'll stay there until my brother, Frankie, arrives. After our mini-vacation, we'll go back to Manila to resume my studies. That is if I still want to stay in Manila. At the moment, I haven't made a decision yet. Dad wants me to stay with him for a long time. Mom also wants the same, but I know deep down that she's just saying it because she loves me and doesn't want me to get hurt. She always says she wants me to come back to Manila after the vacation, but the truth is, a part of her wants to be alone so she can spend time with Kuya Frankie, her new husband. Yeah, Mom got married again, but not to the same man she married before, not to my dad. She married someone else, but thank God Kuya Frankie is a good man. He always wants Mom to be happy. I think that's enough to say that my mom is a good person, right? Maybe it's Kuya Frankie who will bring her happiness now, someone who used to be my dad's role. I'm sad because of that, but when I think about it, maybe it's better that way. It's better to move on than to suffer and be lonely.

I also feel sad for Dad because it seems like I'm constantly rejecting his desire for me to live with him and study in

Cebu. Maybe this is the time to make it up to him. Mom has someone in her life, but Dad doesn't. He didn't remarry after Mom left him. He was completely broken. And here I am, constantly rejecting him, as if I don't want to be with him. It's really disheartening for him, and I don't want him to be sad because of me. I don't want to do to him what Mom did and said before she left. I don't want to hurt either of them, so I need to decide. I need to think. I need to be careful in everything I do because if I make a mistake in my decision and one of them gets hurt, it will have a double impact on me.

Sigh!

What a mess!

I ended up telling a long story. By the way, Mom and I are leaving now. She even pinched my side when I approached her.