The Beginning of the End

Chapter 6

The break room was in the back of the store's second floor, sitting beside a shelf of bows and arrows.

Upon seeing this, Sugawara and Daichi remembered Tanaka. They finally allowed themselves to grieve.

"Oh god.." sobbed Suga, clasping his hand on his mouth and falling to his knees.

Daichi stared blankly at the shelf, he felt as if his heart had stopped.

"It's my fault... it's all my fault... it's my fault he's gone.." he murmured. He buried his face in his hands, muffling his cries.

"H-how is it your f-fault" hiccuped Suga, looking at his friend with a tear streaked face.

"I told them we'd make it, I told them I'd take care of everything! But I didn't... I failed Suga.. I failed him.." Daichi said, his sobs deepening.

Sugawara stood up. He jabbed Daichi's side and clasped his face in his hands, forcing the brown haired boy to look at him.

"Listen to me Daichi... it isn't your fault! No one blames you! And I know that- that Ryū wouldn't want you to blame yourself either..."

Daichi closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He wanted to believe his friend, he wanted to believe that Tanaka's death wasn't his fault.

"I could've done more... I- I could've forced him to come with me before those other monsters showed up. I could've stayed in the back with Asahi.. prevented any attacks.."

"Stop Daichi... please..." Suga was weeping, his heart felt heavy.

Not only had he lost someone he cared for, he also realized how guilt stricken his best friend was.

"We all could have done more, but it's too late. So please Daichi.." Suga begged, choking on his tears. "Please don't blame yourself.. it's not what Tanaka would have wanted..."

Daichi thought about it. What Tanaka wanted.. why did it matter? Tanaka was gone.

"Ryū.." continued Suga. "He wasn't the type to hold a grudge... he never blamed others for their mistakes.."

Daichi looked at Suga in wonder, what point was his friend trying to make?

"So.. what you're doing right now.. it's an insult to his memory! Blaming yourself for his death!"

Daichi's eyes widened, processing what his friend had just said. Was he really insulting Tanaka's memory by allowing his guilt to consume him?

But if it hadn't been for his lack of action, Tanaka would still be alive.

Daichi couldn't bring himself to believe what Suga was saying.

"I'm sorry Suga but you're wrong.. whether Tanaka would have wanted me to blame myself or not, it doesn't change the fact that because of my inaction he died."

Sugawara looked at the brown haired boy with sad eyes. Tears were still streaming down his face, touching his lips and leaving a salty taste.

He removed his hands from Daichi's face and looked at the ground, feeling defeated.

"It's going to be okay now Suga. I won't let anyone else die. I'll hold on to this guilt as a reminder."

Suga gave a small nod. He was reluctant to end the discussion, he knew that Daichi's guilt would eventually break him. But for now, he couldn't bring himself to argue any further.

"We should look for some food.." he croaked.

Daichi agreed and followed him into the break room. Inside was a refrigerator, a microwave, and a table with a few chairs jutted on the side.