Don't Leave Me Alone...

Hope

There was a knock at my door, causing me to nearly fall out of my chair. I hurriedly brushed the petals into the trash and closed my laptop. "Come in!" 

 "Kaminari-Kun-" A familiar voice called, the door creeping open. "Hello?" A green bush of hair peeked around the corner of the door, a nervous look in his face. Izuku Midoriya, my classmate and friend. We weren't exactly close but I knew I could rely on him if I needed something and the same for him.

 "Hey, what's up?" I grinned, trying to hide the emotional turmoil I was going through. He seemed nervous but I brushed it off as Midoriya being Midoriya.

 "I just..." He slowly shut the door behind him, leaning up against it and pressing the palms of his hands against it. He was wearing a maroon hoodie and had a little things in his hair, as he got closer I realized they were Uraraka's little hair clips, the shapes varying from stars to little candies. He seemed to not acknowledge them, probably put in without his permission as they looked rushed and messy. I felt a genuine smile creep onto my face as he sat on the floor by my table, unconsciously fidgeting with the things in it. "I came to talk about earlier today in Aizawa-Sensei's class..." I felt my heart jump in my chest.

 "W-What about exactly? " I gulped down my nerve and tried to keep a straight face. /He didn't see me right?/

 "So I saw that Kirishima-Kun was with Kacchan and then you went over, leaving looking dejected moments later..." /Fucking shit./

"Oh it was nothing-"

"Moments later you left abruptly with no explanation..." He picked at his nails, a serious string in his voice I didn't normally have to hear. He then reached into his hoodie pocket. "Nobody else seemed to really notice except Sero, Jiro, Mina and I but I was the only one to find..." He pulled out a trampled, wilted green petal and placed it in the palm of my hand , staring up at me with his huge eyes. "What's going on?" He looked serious and it made my stomach do flips. Normally he was so bubbly and sweet.

"I..."

"I mean I know but-"

"What?"

"Hanhaki." He shrugged. "I have... Experience you could say." He rubbed his thumb across his throat and smiled grimly. This was a whole new side of him I had never seen and it scared me.

"Midoriya... You have hanhaki?" I leaned forward a little.

"For three weeks tomorrow, stage two." He nodded, folding his hands. "And you?"

"I-I..." /I can trust him right?/ He was really my only hope in the situation... "Yes. This morning it started and I -"

"Shh... Who for, Kamanari, who?" He stared at me, his gaze softening. He looked concerned.

"K-Kirishima-"

"Okay good you still have some hope-" He sighed.

"What are you talking about?"

"The two cures, surgery and confession. You might be able to confess... My only option is surgery-" He looked down, frowning.

"I-I don't want surgery-" I looked at the door, swearing I could hear Kiri's voice. "H-He's gonna reject me and I'm gonna die knowing that he's happy." I decided quickly. /Without him I am just a shell of Kaminari. I am empty/ Midoriya's eyes went wide with concern.

"Kaminari, you can't just throw your life away like that- you have so much potential, as a person and a hero! Your quirk is amazing and so is your personallity, you don't deserve that-"

"I already decided. I can't forget him, I'd rather die. I don't give a shit about anything else, I need him to be happy and that's all."

 "B-But what about your happiness-"

 "I'll be happy when I know I have succeeded in what I need to do.  I can finally be at peace with myself and these unbearable feelings." He finally stayed silent, looking hurt. I felt bad and kneeled down next to him. "Listen, I know you want to help me and stuff, but everything will be fine. After I... Go... You'll forget about me and so will everyone else, but I'll always be here." I pushed my index finger to his heart, smiling sadly. "I'm probably being super cringey right now but I think it needed to hear it. I still have a few months left, so let's live it to the fullest, okay? Try not to let some dumb flowers get in our way." He nodded, still looking down.

" K-Kacchan... I... I love him... I shouldn't but I just... " His voice cracked and I knew that he was about to cry. "H-He... I love him b-but he... He hates me to the point he w-wants me to d-die-" He began to sob, his quiet noises  bringing me in to hug him comfortingly. "I l-love him s-so much, Kaminari -" 

"I know you do... " He shook each time he sobbed, causing a jolt through my spine. I never realized how two truly broken people can connect on a level no one else ever could. I knew how he felt and, though it's selfish, it made me feel good that I wasn't the only one. I hugged him close and listened to him, trying to calm him down slowly. We stayed there in my floor for awhile, understanding how each other felt and trying to help each other. It was so scary and I was glad that we could try to help each other navigate. We were going to have the next two months to do things we never did before, to feel things we never felt, and eventually be at peace with how we felt. I finally had some hope.

939 words

(Here's a little bit of positivity for your sad souls. Vote and comment if you are enjoying so far and want more!)