On our way home Tay wanted to drive so I could call Jeffrey. I wouldn't have done it if she wasn't with me. My hands shook as I dialed his number and placed it at my ear. Half of me wanted him to answer, the other didn't.
''Hello'' he answered, no excitement in his raspy voice; it was understandable. I felt sick to my stomach and I could barely open my mouth to speak. ''Hello?'' he repeated.
''Hi'' I said and there was silence for a few seconds. ''What are you doing?''. Ugh, get to the fucking subject.
''On my way home, I just had an interview'' he answered shortly.
''I think we should talk about what happened''.
''No shit'' he was pissed and I understood him. ''I'm confused and I have no idea what's going on''.
''I know, I'm sorry. I freaked out, didn't know what to do'' my heart was pumping extremely fast and my hands were sweaty.
''You just ignored me. You could've just answered my calls or text me. It took you almost three days, it's not fair, you know? I don't even know what's going on''.
''I know. I don't do relationships anymore and it scared the shit out of me. I don't know what I want or if I even want a relationship ever''. Taylor took a quick glance at me and slapped my leg because what I was telling Jeffrey was not what she expected. She wanted me to make it up to Jeffrey, to ask him to meet up and talk face to face.
''You told me all those things for what? For nothing? We fuck and then you're gone? I am so confused'' he sounded hurt and my heart felt broken. ''You can't just go around doing this, it's hurting people, Hazel''. My name sounded so beautiful between his lips even when he was so hurt.
''No, it's not like that. I'm just scared, that's all''.
''That's all you're gonna say? That's it?''. I didn't say anything for a while, just listened to his voice and tried to take it in. ''Are you trying to say that there's nothing between us? That the other night didn't mean absolutely anything to you?''.
''I'm sorry'' was all I could say.
God, silence killed me. I heard him sigh before speaking. ''I forgive you, Hazel. I have to go now. Goodbye'' he said before hanging up. I couldn't hold my tears anymore so I started sobbing like a baby. I knew I was going to miss him so much but I didn't want to. There had to be something I could do to forget about him, please.
''Why the fuck are you crying now? You are the most stupid girl I've ever met. You just lost a man so good for you''. That was the last and only thing my best friend said during the whole trip home.
▪
Maria could feel something was up so I had to tell her everything, her reaction similar to Taylor's. Not a single day went by without Jeffrey in my mind; it was like he was haunting me. He was in my dreams, in my mind every time I closed my eyes. I never washed the T-shirt I wore on the night we made love because it had his scent in it and that was the closest to him I could get. Tay kept telling me to call him again, to go back to him because it was obvious I was in love, obvious that I missed him. But that was the problem; I did miss him like crazy, but the scary thought of being in a relationship stopped me.
''Planet earth to Hazel, are you here, hun?'' Maria waved her hand in front of my eyes, snapping me out of my stupid thoughts.
''Oh man, sorry. I should stop zoning out so much'' I was so frustrated with myself.
''That's how it is when you're in love'' she raised her eyebrows up and down. In love, ugh. Fuck love.
''Anyway, back to work'' I opened the e-mail to see there were some new ones. I went through each of them and the last one was from a person Maria had worked for before and knew. Reading it, I smiled widely. ''Maria?'' I said, my smile so big that my cheeks were hurting. She looked at me and waited to see what I had to say. ''You've literally been asked to plan a surprise birthday party for Halle Berry''.
''Hell to the yeah! It's what we do best, baby'' she said excitedly. Surprise birthday parties were something Maria was very good at, her specialty. I was so glad I was her personal assistant because I could be part of everything she did and planning surprise parties was so fun; it never felt like work. Maria had been at parties with Halle Berry where she took me with her; I was even at a more private dinner with her and Halle Berry once. That woman was insanely beautiful.
''And guess what?''.
''What?''.
''We're on the guest list as well'' I said even more excitedly than before; I fucking loved my job and my boss for taking me with her everywhere even though it was her who was the master mind behind each event and I was just a personal assistant.
