I was putting my shoes on when he just came and stood there next to me. ''No. I can't do this shit. Are you just going to play games or what? I need an explanation on what is going on because I don't understand anything'' he seemed determined to get his answer.
I stood up and looked him in the eyes. ''I'm not for you, that's all. I do all these things all the time, I just...we're not the same. Understand that, it's not that hard'' I said angrily.
''Oh, you're not for me? You think you're this bad girl that doesn't do anything but party and wow...act rebellious. But no, you're not as much of a bad girl as you think. I've seen your soft sides and I know that you are more than just partying and all that. But it's fucking unfair that you play these stupid games where you make me think you like me more than that and then you act cold and badass and it's fucking frustrating and annoying. Stop acting so childish and decide, because you can hurt people with your attitude''.
I could feel the anger build up inside me. ''You have no fucking clue, Jeffrey. You know why I am like this? A ''bad girl'', as you call it? You know why I can't decide what to do when it comes to you? Because 5 years ago I had my heart broken so hard that it turned into bodily pain and had to be admitted to the hospital. I went into a depression I thought I'd never recover from. My whole world fell apart because of a shitty ass man who decided he wanted to break me, he shattered my world into pieces. I changed. Maybe I'm cold, fuck knows. But it's better than getting hurt again''. Tears wanted to fill up my eyes but I didn't allow that. I wasn't going to cry, I had no reason to.
''You can't just go around and be sure that if you get with someone they're going to hurt you'' he sounded so frustrated and I just stood there listening to him, blood boiling with anger and sadness. ''Not every man in this world is going to hurt you. I wouldn't hurt you for anything in this world if I was with you''. My heart pumped so hard in my chest I thought it was going to explode. He was sincere and sweet, his eyes on mine as he analyzed every single part of my face.
''Jeffrey I...'' I sighed. ''...I think I'm gonna go home for now. I'm sorry''.
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I grabbed my purse and left without looking back. I drove directly to Tay's where I told her everything, sobbing as loud as I could.
''You are so stupid Hazel'' Tay said as she held me and caressed my hair. ''I love you so much and I want the best for you, and I think the best for you right now is Jeffrey. You've never said it with words but you like him, I know it. I know you. You talk about him every single day, you smile that cheesy smile when you tell me about the times you hang out. It's so obvious yet you're so stubborn and refuse to accept that you're finally in love again'' she spoke to me with a soft voice, yet I know she was irritated at me. ''And jesus, Hazel, everyone can tell that he likes you too''.
''I just panic if I feel the smallest thing, I'm so scared Tay. I'm fucking scared'' I started crying, feeling helpless for the first time in a while. ''He is so kind to me, so respectful. I don't think I've ever seen a more handsome man in my entire life. Every time I feel his scent I literally turn weak, he is the definition of art and it freaks me out so much'' I continued truthfully. Speaking about him tickled my stomach awfully much.
''I think it's time for you to go back to the real you. I miss the real Hazel, the soft one'' my best friend smiled at me and it felt so comforting. ''I really think you should go back there and let him know how you actually feel''.
''What if he doesn't want me anymore now?''.
''Don't be silly. The man is crazy about you''. I got up and checked my stupid face in the mirror, trying to fix the smeared make up and my messy hair. ''Hazel, go'' Tay hurried me before gaving me a hug.
I drove back to Jeffrey and knocked on the door. Please answer, please answer. Please don't be mad at me. It took longer than usual, but he opened the door, surprise on his face as he locked eyes with mine. ''I'm sorry'' I spoke as I kept looking at him.
''Come on in'' he stepped aside and I went in.
''I'm sorry for leading you on and then acting like a player. I'm not one, I swear'' he stood in front of me and listened carefully. ''I don't want to play with your feelings. I really think it's time for me to accept that I actually really, really like someone. I like you, Jeffrey, a lot''. The face of the beautiful man in front of me softened and I could see a sweet, tiny smile form on his lips.
Jeffrey took a step towards me but continued to stay silent. His eyes showed mixed positive emotions and when I felt his hand on my cheek I started burning with desire; desire to feel his lips on mine. He was breathing heavily and after a short while he lifted up my chin gently and pressed his lips onto mine, leaving me without air in my lungs. His sweet, soft lips tasted mine delicately, passionately, gently, and my legs were jelly; my whole body was jelly. It was a kiss I didn't know I craved so much. A kiss I had been waiting for for so long, one I didn't know I'd get to feel ever again. It was like no other kiss, it was beautifully addicting.
The cigarette taste in his mouth mixed with mine perfectly and I didn't want to stop tasting him. He growled softly into my mouth as his other hand pulled my body much closer into his, causing a soft moan to escape my throat. That kiss was all I needed to know Jeffrey was the man I wanted.
