Chapter 1 : Dads gone

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by PACOTHEMARTIANMAN

by PACOTHEMARTIANMAN

My father was a blurry image in my head for the longest. I would literally try to draw what he may look like. For the longest I grew hatred towards my mom because I was thinking she was keeping him away from me. Living in Tyler we would take trips to longview and go to court for the first couple of trips I thought mom was being nice and was letting me skip school. One trip I asked her "why are we going to longview? She said you may see your dad. So the next day when it was time to go to longview I was super excited like I even imagined him coming out the back and we hugged and I can tell him all about myself. But he didn't show. Mom was on the phone with him when we left cursing him out. I asked why didn't he show she then said "he said he couldn't make it" . from then on I grew distant from the care of who my father was or if he was Even living.

Flash forward to 7th grade summer heading into 8th grade. Back when fb was hot lol I finally found out the name of my father at the age of 13 I finally found out his name. So I was being smart one day and I searched him online couldn't find any lick of evidence. But I looked on facebook. And it was him. After 13 years I finally found my dad. From the looks of it he was well off pretty well off he was a graphic designer. See where I get it from. He studied studio commercial art and graphic design. One day I finally had the guts to message him and our conversation went like this

Me: hi my name is Dregonious Moreland and my mom said you're my dad

Him : ya I am

Me: you think I can come see you ever

Him: no I think it be best if I speak to your mother first

Me: oh ok well good to finally talk to you

Me: hey

Me: hello

After that 8th grade started and 8th grade was pretty good for me had my first kiss. Well let's say mid Oct or some he died. And I don't know why but I cried. I cried because my chances of ever seeing him was completely gone.throughout my whole life I would try to imagine what it would be like if he was apart of my life, and to make matters worse we share the same birthday....It feels unfair sometimes. But I cried for at least 5 minutes I sat in bed and just started to smile because apart of me felt unchained I wasn't going to let the absence of my father determine who I could be in life. That day and then on I chose to be a champion and I wasn't going to let him ruin my life.