A depressed girl suffering from abuse physically and mentally because of her parents and friends. But no one knows about it because her smile and act of happiness that she puts on every single even if it hurts...
Angst will be shown throughout the...
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Everything is constantly getting worse more voices taking over her head more cuts being made. Panic attacks coming and going. That was never new to her yet the amount of things that had happened was all because of herself. Yet she had to fight the demons off while At school called her " friends " and ateez which she never knew why they wanted to be friends with her in the first place.
The day had just started and now it was just the beginning of another school week which was not the greatest after all the blood, tears and anxiety attacks that she had was not good at all. Yet another fake ass smile and mask will just cover up the depression state that she was in. Ateez weren't clueless when I came to y/n they knew that something was wrong but never said anything. They noticed some of the signs like not eating as much, not talking, always tired but she always kept a smile as if nothing happened. People would think that she was okay but that was never true in a way, yeosang constantly tried to talk to her but y/n never said anything but just say a word or two. While the other members didn't take a hint of what was going on with y/n , they were trying but just not enough like yeosang. Everything didn't do any good what was the point of them trying if they were going to fail just like her "friends" but anyways they were just meant to come to any end since they were just getting toxic people. It was lunch and there was stuffed llamas being given away on the day of Valentine's Day which y/n wasn't to happy about since it meant her not getting on from her friends like always but I didn't effect her since she was already used to it from this type of behavior her friends gave her. It also didn't help that she was starting to get a headache from all this shit, maybe a small rest will help her headache and the Suffocating voices and thoughts that replayed in her head over and over again. 5 minutes later she felt a tap in her shoulder but just let it slide like as if Someone cared about her but it just continued until y/n had enough and lift her head to see yeosang with a small smile.
Until the eye contact was cut off my her other friend Jaely who was her trusted friend she had but never sat with her friends since there wasn't space for her. I noticed how they were concerned for a while now but she just let it slide. " hey y/n i wanted to talk to u for a sec if that's okay?" Jaely asked
" ....s-sure" y/n responded
They all walked out of the cafeteria and went to a small patio outside and yeosang wanted to go to be there for y/n but mainly to know exactly what's wrong. They all sat down at a small table and Jaely spoke up
" honey what's wrong I have seen you happy and smiling but once I turn for a second I see that smile is gone" jaely ranted
" it's nothing really, just a bad day I guess" y/n said
" no it's not, you have been like this for A while now it's more then that" yeosang said a bit angry
" we aren't trying to rush you or anything we just want answers that's all okay take all the time u need okay " Jaely replied
As she was reaching for y/n shoulder, y/n flinched slightly Before leaning In for a hug which made her feel happy and good for Once and it felt so nice that it made her start sobbing while Saying " okay I'll try" y/n spoke softly while crying
"Good" jaely and yeosang said that the same time
Y/n wasn't ready to tell them but she couldn't take it anymore all the emotions bottling up it just exploded and started to cry even hard. Jaely and yeosang looked at each and back at y/n. They broke the hug and noticed how y/n was basically shaking , her breathing became more rapid and her hands turning into fists which would definitely leave marks. Yeosang and jaely tried to process what's happening and they quickly got to her one on Both sides of her which caused y/n to flinch but couldn't take it and started to pull her hair and everything it looked like more then a mental breakdown but also a panic attack
" y/n stop it, don't do this, let go of your hair please calm down" jaely said
" I-I c-c-can't br-breat-the m-ma-make I-it s-st-stop" y/n cried while covering her ears as more voices started to haunt her once again
" Y/N listen to me focus on me and only me okay" yeosang said trying to calm her down a bit and her breathing too
" o-okay" y/n choked out
At a good 5 minutes her breathing was finally normal , she stopped crying a bit but the voices weren't gone they we're getting louder and louder tell her to kill herself. That she is worthless and even more
" please please make it stop, make it stop" y/n whispered and once again balling her fists which both of them caught on and tried to stop her but she was stronger and they told her multiple times to stop but at the end she started bleeding and it only made y/n feel more alive since this was what the voices in her head told her to do.
Jaely and yeosang were confused and convinced that something was definitely wrong that there is something affecting her and maybe physically and mainly mentally too. ~~~~~~~~~
I know it's been a while since I lasted posted but i just dealt with toxic friends. I'll try to get back on track with this story but my other book too. If u don't mind check out my other book and feel free to leave a request too. :)
