Day one

The check up

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ERIN:
jay had gone to go get the kid last night and  I when to bed. I woke up this morning and went to go throw up like normal and jay was not far behind me I actually work up this morning feeling better then last night so I guess jay was right I just need some sleep witch I have not gotten much of lately the twins had died to start waking up at 3:00 in the morning hunger you know I thought they grew out of waking up in the middle of the night and slept through the night scene they are one but no that was not the case with us ben is still craving into our bed in the middle of the night at night but has gotten used to taking is med 3 times a day with is good for us because then we don't have to hold him down he doses better than jay dose just take some talking two. once I finished emptying my stomach I when to go get Noah insulin pump and his monitor that check his blood sugar. I walked into his room and he was sleeping soundly jay had gone back to bed because it was only 4:30 in the morning. the morning was hard because he hated waking up this was the first night we did not wake up to him in our beds we could not seem to figure out why he was doing it but it was nice to see that he was that the was soundly sleeping in his own bed.
(AT WORK)
H: erin jay my office now
E: hey I see Antonio back when did that happened
H: he came to me yesterday he wanted to come back but that not why your her
J: ok then what is
H: I need to know if you're pregnant because I need you to go undercover with jay but if you're carrying my 5 grandchildren then I'm not going to put you in harm's way
E: hank I can  do it please don't put me on desk duty this early and Incase I was not clear yes I'm pregnant with our 5th child 
H: we are trying to put murder and a drug lord away if he tries to hurt you I will never forgive my self ok I just don't think it safe and whoever I put under I don't know how long it will be not to mention you won't have back up this is deep cover and I can't put you and the baby in danger and jay I'm not sending you because she will worry about you and that not good for her either so I'm sending Hailey and Antonio.
J: sarge will all do respect if you're looking for a couple why not send Kim and Adam
H: Because they have two kids and this is deep cover sniff I won't put Emma or mason in danger
E: hank it deep covers I done it before come please let me and jay do this
H: ya you have done it be for but all the other time you did it you were not pregnant ok I can't take that kind of chance not with Kim and adam because their kid needs to see their mother and father and not for you and that baby because your kids need to see you and that baby need you to take care of your self and I love you but I'm not sending you and I'm not putting you on desk duty either I'm just not sending you into too  deep undercover you can work the case with us  until your 4 months and congratulations jay will you give us a minute
J: he right so play nice y=with your dad
E: will you go 
H: how are you felling
E: fine I lot better than oyster day  I and jay have an appointment with my OBGYN to see how far along I am  a
H: hey I just wanted to say sorry for pushing you to tell him Justin birthday is tomorrow and I know he kept a lot of stiff forms his wife and I don't know I freaked but It was none of my business and I should not have pushed you into telling him 
E: I know you are and I think that if I didn't tell him it would have just eaten me up inside but I need to you to stop treating me like I'm a teenager  ohm I love you but when you get scared or nervous about a thing you go into overprotect mood and you also scare everyone else  as well ok
H: I know and I don't mean to I know that you are a very strong person and a good mom and can handle your safe but you still my daughter and I'm here going to stop worrying about you or my grandchildren and yes I'm going to get like that sometimes and I might read you like your 15 again so when I do that just know  I love you and I don't mean top do I just dint what to lose you ever
E: I know you don't and I know that this day is going to be hard for you you and tomorrow even harder but I miss him two and like you are always saying lean on your team on your family  and lean on me ok I miss my little brother tow and my mo and those day weeks are going to be hard for us but we have to learn to cope with each other so how about tomorrow you come over for dinner with me the kid and jay and we will say one out to my little brother Justin
H: god I love yin kid go beet put of her and have and tell Antonio and Haley that they are a good or cover
E: you had them as a back up didn't you
H: yes I did there was no way in hell kid that I was going to let you go in deep cover while you were pregnant 
J: hey erin our appointment at Chicago med is in 15
E: I thought it was later tonight  I moved it come, one momma 
(AT MED)
OBGYN: hi erin baby number 5 conjugations
E: thank you
OBGYN: so let have a look to see how far along this little one is well your 8 weeks along and the baby of your r look healthy because of spoor last pregnancy and it being high risk I want to do a check-up every 2 weeks just to make sure everything is ok and please take it easy be for you goons well I what to. run some tests to make sure everything fine also to see if you BZT is back around this pregnancy.
(20 minutes later)
J: relax baby is going to be ok we got this just like the last pregnancy
E: ya your right but we got lucky last time  I was told there was a good chance that I would have to me drudged in order to give birth normally or have a c section. jay I don't what surgery ok I want to have this baby nature
J: ya and it worked out and you dint have to have sugary or be drugs you had or babies and I'm proud of you for that and love you for that, ok this baby is going to be strong two ok we go this
E: ya
OBGYN: erin so in sorry to say that your BZT is back and it is worse this time if you get too stressed out you could lose the baby and you both could die if your blood pressure gets toe high you could hemorrhage I recommend you terminate the pregnancy I'm sorry but the risk of losing both our you aren two high
J: ok what is the chance thought that is she make it throughout  the pregnancy and her and the baby are ok
OBGYN: 50/50 chance that she and the baby make it   ill give you two some time to talk and get the pictures
E: jay baby I can't do it you heard the heartbeat I heard it that our baby I can't un her that the first time I got pregnant I wanted to get rid of the baby but I couldn't do it I could not be a mom and the moment I heard the heartbeat of our baby my Harte melted and I could not do it I wanted to fell that bundle of joy moving around in there
J: erin I can't lose you ok I love you and I love my child but I can't bear to lose you ok I need you the kids need you we all need you
E: jay I can't do it ok please I will take it easy and be very careful I will but I can't give up this baby jay I can't and you won't lose me ok
J: erin baby their a 50/50 chance that you make it through this
E: I know but we go this just like your always telling me ok come on let get out of her
J: ERIN! I
E: jay this is my body and I'm the one carrying this baby I'm the one that has to go through 15 hours of labor, ok I'm having this baby and I can't explain it but hearing our baby heartbeat and know that it their our child is there I can't tare my self away from that I just can't ok can we go and talk more about this latter we need to get back to work
(AT THE DISTRICT)
H: hey jay what up
J: ok I probably should not be talking to you about this but erin won't talk to me about it anymore and I'm losing it
H: ok jay calm down what wrong
J: the OB said that there is a 50/50 chance that erin and the baby could die  if she got through with this pregnancy  and erin want to have the baby and I do to but I can't Lose her I just can't and if she gets too stressed out of something happens on the job she could die
H: jay stop and breath ok I understand why erin does not what to give up this baby she fell in love with is already and to tell you the truth u think if erin get ride of this baby she will go into a dark place in her head and we both know what happens when she gets like that at this point this is up to you and her and I can't lose her either but this is one decision that I can't make  she has to make this decision not you not me her she has to be ok with doing this what does the doctor say
J: well she said that  she will do everything she can to make sure that this pregnancy goes the way it needs two and that erin need to come in  ever two weeks and on Strickland's desk duty starting now witch erin is not happy about but I think she knew that she has to be a lot more careful than before 
H: well I think you just need to be there for her and while she her ill look after for her as well ok you can't force this on her she has to take this her decision ok now the both of you go home 
( AT HOME)
J: erin baby
E: jay, not this again ill make it ok and so will this baby, ok I and I know that I need to do everything the doctor says and take it easy ok
J: baby just listens to me. I take to hank because I need someone to talk to about this and we are the only one that now ok and he brought up a good point this has to be up to you if you what to keep thereby then I will be right by your side and I will not leave it and if you don't what to have the baby then I will be right by your side on that two OKs in combat make this chose for you I'm here to support you and love you and be a father to our children and your right I don't quite understand what it like for you to get rid of our child or to have he or she moving around but I know how happy it makes you and that'll I what is for you to be happy
E: thx you jay and I love you with all my heart and I know that you are scared of losing for me but I will take good care of me and the baby, ok but I can't do it ok I can't
J: ok then let have us a baby now you go lay down ill pick ups lunch and pick up the twins and Noah early he  needs his med any want and from now on until that little one is born you are two not lift a finger and ill wake up to give Noah his meds and I get rot to be very overprotective of you
E: ok  I can handle that if it means that we get to have another baby or should I say I get to have the baby you know I am the Ione in labor
J: ya and you know that if I could take the pain away I would but I can't and you are strong and I'm proud of you got going though this for me and giving me 3 beautiful children
E: got hit the hell did I end up so luck with an amazing man 4 beauty children and for giving me lima and convincing me to adopt lima  and just for everything
J: I don't know how I end up with an amazing girl but I glad I did because she gave me 4 beautiful children and is about to give me another one.  now go lay down