My Soliloquy Disgruntled With Love

ˈFālyər /

I fear the vast dimensions of my potential i know i have, so i limit it

when i'm evidently wasting it visibly in-front of spectators that caution me on "going down the wrong path" has a better feel to it than being told "you got it" by fellows that seem oblivious (in my clouded opinion) to the notion that i may not..

i find serendipity in my achievements and comfort in the idea of rejection or failure which ironically, the same comfort brings forth an unwelcome great feeling of apprehension that i will fail.

A fellow, Peter Drucker, once(or maybe trillion times) said "you cant manage what you cannot measure". I think about this quote more than i think about climate change and realise that all dimension spectrum measured in all aspects of my existence, theres really only one thing that can be quantified, the result of it all.

considering what P. Drucker said, id be glad if i could measure every decision and outcome, in every instantaneous moment, with the guarantee of a black-and-white assurance that "you will succeed or fail".

but i guess thats not the case now sir P.

so we move.

seeing that i cannot remove this constant fear of failure, might as well feel fear over things really worth losing...and maybe stop sweating over the small stuff.