Mr. Prince, you are dead | | j.jk. x reader

✨

✨"Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't try to edit your sould according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly." - Anne Rice✨

✨ "구부리지 말고 물을 뿌리지 말고 논리적으로 만들지 말고 패션에 따라 영혼을 편집하려고하지 마십시오. 오히려 무자비하게 가장 강한 집착을 따르십시오." -앤 라이스 ✨

|Chapter 28:"Diary update"|

15 days later;

'Dear diary,

It's been a long time since I wrote, huh? I guess I'm used to writting here when I have too much feelings and thoughts in my head. I sure do have them now, but the real reason behind me writting is that too much things have happened since a new chapter in my life started. By that, I mean attending one of the best schools in Seoul. Private one, on top of that. I thought it would be great having to study there, but the whole time, I got more things on my back rather than books and education. My life took a big turn and here I am, studying in a public school in Busan, which is not my hometown. I didn't think of leaving Seoul so soon, rather never to be honest, but many things have made me decide like this.

Do you want to hear something crazy? I even found myself a boyfriend! Unbelievable, right? I couldn't believe either. Tho I refused him in the beginning, he slowly made his way in my heart and melted it. But, I was the reason for his inccident. He nearly drowned because of me and I still can't forgive myself. For his sake, I left Seoul, and left him. It's better if I keep my distance, I'm a human bad luck bringer.

I'm still in contact with my dear friend, Taehyung. He knows about everything- which school I'm going to, my address,
and basically everything. It's a big relief that we stayed in contact, otherwise I would feel too lonely. He's still searching for the right girl, but we cleared out that it would be great dating him, it's just that I kinda don't see him in that way anymore, and especially now, when I'm so fragile and not ready for any relationship. Even tho, Jungkook and I never officially broke up. Anyhow, I'm glad Taehyung still has by back.

He would report Jungkook's state changes. He visited him in the hospital twice, but didn't go inside the room. Unfortunately, Jungkook is still in coma. Doctors say that it's caused by huge mental trauma, followed by a near death experience, which can put anyone in a bad health state. They said his finger would move from time to time, but still no opened eyes in the view. And that's putting me into bigger missery than I'm already in.

As for my new life, it seems like I've moved on. You know, new surroundings, new people around, new apartment and everything. I'm even smiling like everything's okay.
It's because I'm really trying to forget. Even if Jungkook wakes up soon, I'm aware that he probably will not want to talk to me. If he tries to, he will not be able to find me. And i'm okay with that. He deserves to move on, find a new girlfriend and enjoy in life. It will take a while for me to recover, my heart is still healing. The worst thing are nightmares that keep reminding me of how cruel of a person I am every night. I'm not able to sleep because of them. All I keep seeing is deep and dark water. All I keep feeling is it's coldness on my skin. All I keep hearing are gasps for air. And I want it all to stop. I even tried taking medicines, but they didn't work.

One more thing that I'm super worried about is Namjoon. It's been 18 days since the incident happened, since he went missing. The rescuers didn't stop searching for him since, but never once they found a clue of where he can be. The wave clapped him down the last time I saw him. If I knew that would happen, I would've jumped in the water myself. But I was too scared. Two brother's lifes were ruined, maybe even lost that day and it's my fault. It's completely understandable why their family doesn't want me close anymore.

I hope God will hear me and return the life in both of them. I pray for Namjoon to be alive as much as I pray for Jungkook to wake up.

Just talking about this makes my chest tighten..

Moving to the brighter topic, I like this new school so far. It's public so there are many students from the same level as me. I mean, sometimes between rich and poor. They are very friendly and I have a couple of friends that I'm studying with. I'm doing good in studies so far. There's no a lot of homework, so I have enough time to do a part-time job as a waitress. It's enough money to pay for my rent this month and for some necessary things. So, I can't complain yet, can I?

Well anyway, I hope I will write more. My phone is buzzing, so I should pick up the call. Bye for now, my diary.

Sincerely, y/n.'

💜