Love is a Commitment (Taglish)

Their's

May kumakatok sa gate ng bahay namin at nagbuzzer. Tinatamad na naman akong tumayo sa kinauupuan ko.

"PASOK KA NALANG!" Sigaw ko habang nag lalaro ng idle game. Alam ko, tinatamad ngani.

"Papasukin mo na lang po ate" Sabi ko sa katulong namin.

*Door opens with a loud thud*

"Han, ano ba? Bakit di mo na lang binuksan? Malay mo magnanakaw ang pumasok sa bahay, tinanong mo sana kung sino muna." Umupo siya sa sofa tabi ko.

"Bakit, magnanakaw ka ba? At may akyat bahay bang nagbubuzer? Meron, pero wapakels." Alam niyang kaya ko bugbugin kung sino man ang manggugulo sa bahay namin.

For over 3 years, I have been living with Keith. Didto sa bahay na pinamana sa kanya ng parents niya. We are both on our early 20s when we started being "roommates", with benefits of course but not the total explore the third base. Sorry folks, we're "too conservative" I know. It's part of our deal, tie the knot first before the slip ups. And I will not be the one to do the move, darling. 

He's been giving me hints since the first few years... nope months to be exact, that he wants to be my husband. But, I want to enjoy my youth, my aspirations, I have dreams, and I, uhmm... Ugh! I have been avoiding this conversation with him. Giving him a little bit of drama, to spice this relationship at least once in a while.

Well, fine. Just between me and you. It's because I don't want to hinder his freedom and progressing success as an engineer. He worked his ass off just to have a stable spot. It takes years to do that. 

That's how much I am contented and love him. Well, binahay ako teh. It's almost the same with being his wife already. Just, being free. 

I want to give him freedom so badly. I honestly don't care about my own, it was just an excuse for him to continue with his dreams and not feel any responsibility with me.

I know, it is all contradicting. But, hear me out. I told him that I will give him a trail of hints once I am ready, as a go signal from me to step to the next chapter of our lives together.

I might tell him someday that "I am already pregnant, and we're gonna have a shotgun wedding in five hours." Hahahaha. Kidding aside, let's continue the conversation I was having with MY MAN. 

"Hindi. Pero malay mo ayaw lang maging bastos kaya't nag bubuzzer. Ikaw talaga pilosopa tas tamad." Acting like he's stating something important. Dahil dun inirapan ko lang siya.

"Che, ewan ko sayo. Kahit 5 years na tayo hindi ka pa nasanay sakin. Nagpapalambing lang Han."

"Tss lambing... Asus, really Kie? Sabi mo tamad ako." May pasimangot pa akong nalalaman.

"Oo, bakit may angal? Pero sorry. Ayy, nga pala may surprise ako sayo." Nag ala siga pa siya. Pero magsosorry din naman pala.

"REALLY?! Show it to me!"

Lumapit siya akin, yung parang hahalikan ako. Estimated one inch nalang te! We do kiss and get intimate but still I don't want to assume.

"Ako."

"Tss...tsk." Inirapan ko na lang. Amfie.

Pero kinikilig ako. Tumawa siya then he kissed my nose.

"Di joke, meron talaga. Teka."

Tumakbo siya palabas sa kotse niya. After a few minutes lumabas na rin ako. Nakita ko siya sa loob ng kotse niya na sumisenyas na papuntahin ako.

"Kie, ba't ang tagal mo?"

Nabigla ako nung may kinuha siyang box.

"At pumunta ka sa likod kunin mo yung foods mo sa back seat. And someone's waiting for you there, wag kang sumigaw ha?" Sabi niya ng nakangiti at tumango naman ako.

Nang binuksan ko na,
"PUUPPPYY!!! Ayy sorryy!!"
aso ang laman. Awww, so adorable.

Nakakatuwa! Ang lambing ng aso. At hindi siya agad natakot sa akin.

"You like it Han?"

"Veeeryy muchh!!Thank you!"
Sabay hug at kiniss ang cheek niya.

"Pst!I love you..."
While staring at each other.
"Pst!I love you too."
Sabi ko na feel yung sincerity ng sinabi niya.

End of flashback

Arff arff~

Tsk, panirang aso to ohh. Pero mas malambing ka parin kaysa sa taong yun.

"Buti ikaw hindi ka nagbago. Kaysa sa buhay ko ngayon, sobrang dami nang nagbago." Tinabi ko muna yung envelope.

"Tara na nga lang Tim, jogging tayo palibot ng village." Sumunod naman ang malaking aso. 

I trained him well. I don't have to put him on leash, but of course I always do put one on him. He just puts it in his mouth or in his backpack. What? I have a very intelligent and sensible dog. Don't blame the dog, blame the game. He is not built like some people labeled pets to be. 

Linggo ngayon kaya walang pasok. I own a company. Building my own empire. Tiresome but it grows on you. 

I realized, I just had to execute my drafted system to run it. As a novice and softie back then, the challenge was, to maintain running it, whilst realizing it comes with enemies and overcoming annihilating self-doubt. Thank you.

Enough with that, sasamahan ko pa pala sila Francine and Nikki mamili ng mga dresses nila. Lately kasi sina ate at mommy lang, kasi busy ako sa work.

Nasa bahay ko ako ngayon. I purchased this house for my baby. Ipapamana ko to sa kanya. Makauwi na nga sa pamilya ko.

I jogged with Tim, finishing a few blocks as my morning routine. Feels good to jog at mornings, it eases my body after week's stress. It seems like a reward for myself. I let my mind run too on what ever lies ahead on my day. Most specially reminding myself why I work and aim so hard - these are all for my wonderful angel. Something she'll be proud of me. Something she can earn respect and pride for.

I want my child to understand my decisions and my ways of giving her my all but she's too young for now and I doubt she won't hold grudge on me when she finds out. I'm not planning on telling her if I have to. I know I'm getting selfish but this is all for her.

Tama na nga tong overthinking ko. Magluluto na lang ako ng favorite dish ng anak ko.