when fire meets air

Chapter 21: Zuko

Before I start this chapter, I just want to give a trigger warning of assault, both sexual and physical. If you are not comfortable with reading , please skip this chapter. I will write a summary at the beginning of the next chapter for those who skipped this one.

It was dark.
It was always dark.
The lights in the hole were scarce, only ever blinking into existence when a guard would slip him some stale bread and some tea that was most likely spit in.
But he didn't care, not in the least.
Though he was trapped, he was free down here.
The hole was the safest place in the prison for him.
It was a place where he was safe from the other prisoners.
The prisoners who hated him, the prisoners that attacked him, the prisoners that violated him.

Then the vision changed.

He was sixteen. He was a boy so full of passion and anger and light.
But that light was snuffed out.
He watched through his own eyes like a spectator as he picked a fight with one of his fellow prisoners.
He watched as he got pummeled into the dirt, the feeling of this other inmates fists pummeling against his cheeks being a feeling that he would take any day over what happened next.
He hated this part.
It was something that he had only endured once, sure, but the memory was something he would live over and over for as long as he will live.

Later that night, when he was asleep in his cell, the same inmate from before came in. He was so much bigger than Zuko, so much taller and stronger.
And he had brought friends.
Zuko didn't even have time to scream.
So much happened at once, and by the time it was done, he could do nothing except for shake, cry, and hurl. He had been violated past his very core, and when he had hoped it had been done, the big inmate came back.
He remembered seeing his face as he stared down at him and wiped the vomit off of his face.
He knew what happened next; he knew that the guards came in and put the big inmate in the hole.
But in his dreams, that never happened.
In his dreams, he wasn't saved.

And he woke up screaming.

A cold sweat covered his body from head to toe, and his stomach was sick as if he had just spent the last month on the sea. He felt disgusting and violated and he felt his body begin to shake and his heart start to pulse faster and faster and...
And he knew what he needed to do.
He got up from his bed shakily, pulling a tunic over his head before stumbling out the door of his bedroom and into the hall.
Part of him didn't want to bother him, he would feel like a burden and that was the last thing he wanted to do. But he kept going, and before his rational mind could stop him, he knocked on the door of Aang's room.

It took a couple minutes for there to be a response, but when there was, he instantly felt better.
"Zuko... What's wrong?" Aang asked, his voice groggy with sleep, but no less filled with concern.
"I..." He cleared his throat, trying to find his voice. "I had a nightmare, it's no big deal, I'll head back to my room. Sorry for bothering you." He sputtered before turning around.
"No no, it's okay. Come in, sit." Aang was awake now, his voice clear and alert and ready. Zuko obliged, walking through the door and sitting on the edge of Aang's mattress. He was silent, the images from his nightmare repeating in his mind like a sick tableau. He was disgusted with the memory, and it only had just begun to sink in that he is going to finally have to talk to Aang about what happened.

He felt like he was going to throw up.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Aang whispered as he crouched in front of Zuko, a concerned look on his face. The firelord decided to brave it and tell the truth. He couldn't keep it from him any longer, it was too tedious and it hurt him to think about keeping any information from him.
So he spoke.

"It was a memory. One from prison." He started, but gagged a little.
"You don't have to tell me if you're not ready." Aang reassured him, but he held a hand up and nodded, signaling that it was okay.

"It was my first week in the prison. I was angry, I felt betrayed and sad and alone, so I did something stupid. I took on the biggest, scariest looking guy in the yard, because I was Prince Zuko. I had fought along side the Avatar, so of course a big buffoon couldn't take me down." He signed and scanned Aang's eyes, only to see pure terror. If only he knew what happened next.
"I attacked him, hitting him and talking shit, but he was so much bigger than me. He pummeled me into a bloody, bruised mess. My ass would have been dead if the guards didn't drag him off of me. I went back to my room, terrified and in pain. When I went to sleep that night, the big guy and his friends thought to teach me another lesson." A silent tear dripped down his face as he remembered it like it was yesterday.
"They were all full grown, big, between the ages of twenty five and forty, and they saw this sleeping, vulnerable, angry kid and... Violated me in the worst way possible." He gagged on his own words, the bile rising in his throat as he stared at Aang. He was crying now too.
"They took turns, each of them using me and then watching the others when they were done. Then they all left, except for the big guy. He wasn't done yet. I'm sure he would have killed me if the guards didn't come in at that moment. They had heard me screaming and came to help. I remember one of the younger female guards puking on the spot, crying at the sight of it. I was just a kid, you know? A kid who felt betrayed and had only just started to be okay with intimacy, and those big cunts came in and took it from me. They robbed me of my innocence and my childhood." He didn't know he was crying that much until he heard himself sob the last couple words. Aang was crying now even harder, completely unable to form words.

"Is that what you saw in the nightmare?" Aang's whispers were barely audible.
"Yes. But in the dream, the guards don't come, and it goes on over and over again." Zuko stared blankly at a wall, remembering the pain, the sadness.
"I am... I don't even begin to have words for how sorry I am. No one deserves that, no one. Especially you. God, you were just a kid!" Aang stood up, and he seemed angry. His arrows began to glow, and Zuko knew how angry he was.
"Aang calm down, it was six years ago. Some of them are probably dead now." Zuko whispered in hopes that it would convince both of them that it was true. He watched as the arrows calmed down, going back to their dull blue. Aang closed his eyes, his shoulders visibly slumping.
"You are right." He walked over the mattress and sat down next to Zuko, making sure that he was keeping his distance.
"Zuko... I know it may be pushing a line, especially after what you told me, but if you want you can sleep here tonight. I can try to keep the nightmares away. But if its completely out of line, forget I suggested it."
Zuko smiled, a genuine smile. A happy one. He nodded, and without another word, climbed under the covers. He opened his arms, and watched as the person he had had feelings for for 6 years crawled into his arms, and held him while he slipped back into a deep sleep.

A sleep with no nightmares, only pleasant dreams that left him hopeful for the future.

Yall now we got some trauma to resolveeeeee!! Maybe a revenge plot???? Who knows!! I have two ideas for this story, one involves fluff and slowly getting over past trauma and has a cheesy happy ending, and the other has some more angst, some fluff tossed in there, some tears, and a cheesy happy ending!!

Anywho, i hope that yall have a good day and hopefully the next update will be longer!!

Toodles!!

Dylan!!

UPDATE!!

YALL WE DID IT WE REACHED NUMBER ONE ON THE ZUKAANG TAG OMG IM SO HONOURED TO BE HERE, THANK YALL SO MUCH FOR THE 67k READS I LOVE YOU ALL!!!