Lannister [S. Clegane]

》chapter VI《

{Book 1}

》chapter 6《

I don't think I quite prepared myself for the journey home, much less with a newborn baby at least. I almost started to regret not letting a maid look after my child, since I refused to let someone take my job of raising my girl.

I remembered how I myself was raised by maids, and I didn't want my child to be raised without love like I was. But now when I woke up in the middle of the night by loud cries the thought of a maid wasn't so far away.

It was almost torture stepping out of the warm fur to walk over to her little bed, my body not fully recovered from the birth. But as soon as I look into her beautiful, grumpy face; all the pain goes away.

Have you ever fallen in love? Have you ever found a person that seems to exist just for you and makes you wonder what in the world you were doing before you met them? I haven't, but I can imagine that becoming a mother feels at the very least as good.

One day when I sat outside my sent with Dyanna in my arms, the Captain of the guards for Winterfell, Jory Cassel walked up to me.

"How are you feeling, Lady Lannister?" He asked.

I smiled at him, "I'm quite alright, thank you,"

"Has the journey been difficult so far? I can imagine that this little one has not gone easy on you," He referred to my daughter with his eyes.

I chuckled lightly, "No, not really, but I can't complain; this is the happiest I've been in a long time." I tapped the seat beside me on the bench I was sitting at and said, "sit down if you'd like, Ser Cassel,"

He nodded as thanks and sat down. Jory was a strong man, I could tell. He sat with a straight back and grace despite his northern ancestry being known for everything other than their graceful ways.

"Are you exited to see Kings Landing," I asked, after we had sat in silence for longer than I could handle.

"well, last time I was there, a war had just ended. You'd think I would have quite fond memories of it, but it was a bit to-well, warm in my taste,"

I laughed, "well I'm sorry to say that that hasn't quite changed,"

"that's unfortunate, but I'm sure I'll be alright if I can talk to you now and then," he smiled one last time before walking off, "My lady,"

It surprised me, so I didn't have time to say anything back. Jory was quite a handsome man, I noticed then. Noting too special though. I've been to a lot of places in my days and seen all kinds of men. But I have learnt that a man's looks do not determine his way; personality and such. I was even married once and he sure was a handsome man. But stupid and naïve. We can't afford to be naïve in this world. Especially men. Because in the end, they only have themselves as protection.

But a woman, she can be as naïve as can be, but still have all the men in the world dusting off every rock she puts her feet on. Because we need men to look after us and care for us. That's at least what we let them believe. That's at least that we let them believe. Women can't actually afford being naïve, just know how to act like it and use it to our advantage. My sister is the prime example of it, that's how she married the king after all.

But she is far from happy. I can see it in her eyes. But I know she does not wish to speak of it. That is one of the worst things in the world. When you see a person, you care for look unhappy and you just want to reach out and say, "I can see that you are hurting," but you know that they will only push you away.

I've been away from her for far too long to ruin our relationship.

The following days of our journey was tiring, and I slept most of the time, other than when I fed and looked after my daughter. I waved my brother goodbye. Tyrion was leaving with Benjen Stark, to the Wall. It was only for a visit, but I still worried. He wasn't the... well- toughest of men.

One afternoon I woke up just to find the King and Lord Stark speaking. They were speaking of all the women they've been with, or that's what Robert bragging about while Lord Stark answered politely back. As a married man with children should. Robert could learn from it.

I meet my brother, Jaime, who was standing a few meters away from the King and Stark. But close enough to jump in to save Robert if we were to be attacked or so. But also close enough to hear them.

"How are you, Elysa?" He asked. He was happy to see me, because it would distract him from the feeling to live up to his title as "Kingslayer" once again.

"I'm tired." I said, "I'm always tired"

He laughed. "I think that's quite common for new mothers to be. You remember how Cersei almost slept for two days straight after having Joffrey."

I think anyone would have been tired if they had to press that awful thing out of their-

"But she had better circumstances to do so," he said, cutting my thought of.

I was about to agree with him when that awful thing I was thinking about came running into camp in tears, holding his arm to his chest. And the red-haired stark girl not far behind. That's when I knew that the starks wouldn't have as nice of a visit to Kingslanding as they thought they would.

To be continued~