Dancing Around // peter parker

47

I was avoiding my mom. I sat at the staircase, looking out the window as the sun shined in. I was supposed to go buy some crackers because we were all out. That was about three hours ago. I looked at the bag of crackers next to me in the grocery bag. When I sat down, I told myself that it would only be for a few minutes, but I haven't been able to get back up since.

My mom didn't say anything about me passing out. She stayed quiet the whole ride to our home. I finally slept for a bit before my mom woke me and told me to get some crackers. She then said that she got the principal to let me off easily. That I only got Saturday detention and I had to write Flash a letter of apology. I was waiting for my mom to tell me my punishment but she hadn't said anything yet. Though I'm sure my mom was mainly the reason why I got off so easy, I was sure Flash had something to do with it too. Just the fact that he refused to say I was the one who punched him help my case out a lot.

I looked at my hand, bandage wrapped around the spot. It should heal soon. Hopefully before the soccer game. The damn soccer game. I forgot. Why did everything seem to be coming towards me now? Why couldn't events come towards me in an orderly fashion? Why couldn't life pause for a moment so I could take a breathe?

I heard footsteps coming up the stairs. Another neighbor in my building who was afraid to use the elevator, surely. I looked in that direction and spotted Ms. May who looked a lot like a deer caught in headlights. "The elevator is broken," she said. Then she tilted her head to the side. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. I was just tired. I passed out because of exhaustion." That's what the nurse said.

"Oh." She stood on one step and nodded her head like she was listening to a song. "Well, I'm glad you're alright. I was worried."

"You were?"

"Of course I was, but I didn't think it was my place to be there. Besides, Peter was keeping me updated."

"Where is he?"

"Stark internship."

"Oh."

She nodded her head again, before opening her bag and taking out a can. At first, I thought it was an energy drink, but then it turned out to be one of those vegetable drinks. She handed me it. "I got you that. I was going to get you an energy drink because I know you like them a lot, but those things aren't really good for you, and I figure you probably don't eat a lot of vegetables, so."

I grabbed it. "Thanks. It's a good thing too, I stopped drinking energy drinks."

Her eyes widen. "Really? When?"

"Um, today. I was using them to keep myself awake." I didn't understand why it was so easy talking to Ms. May. It was easier than talking to Peter or my mom. I just felt like Ms. May actually listened and she did things like buy me vegetable drinks and show me how to make ice tea. It was like she took every part of me in, even if I was all bad. She was kind of like Cindy, only Ms. May never tried to challenge me. Not that what Cindy was doing was bad. I honestly needed someone like Cindy in my life, but I also needed someone like Ms. May. Someone who would accept me even if there was barely any me.

"You shouldn't do that," she said.

"I'm sleeping now," I said.

She took a seat next to me on the steps, placing her bag in her lap. "I talked to Peter."

"Oh God," I mumbled.

"You know Marina, my parents got a divorce when I was a teenager too. I've told you this, right? I feel like I have."

"You have."

"Well, let me give you some of the details. I speak about the details. My parents would fight about me all the time until finally, they decided to get a divorce. So, logically, I thought they got a divorce because of me."

"I don't think my parents got a divorce because of me, I think they got a divorce because my sister died." She didn't seem surprised, and I wasn't surprised by her lack of reaction. I was sure Peter had already told her. "I think they feel guilty. Like they traded her life for money or something and now they can't stand each other. Like there is too much guilt in the air if they're in the same room and they're scared to choke so they just stay far away from each and me."

"You should talk to your mom."

"She doesn't want to talk about it."

"But you need to. I think you're falling apart, Marina. I think you'll be consumed by it if you don't, and you shouldn't be consumed. You're way too young to be nothing at all. Hell, you should be everything and anything right now."

"Okay, but say, by some miracle, we do talk about it. What if I'm right?"

"You live with it."

"How is that any different from right now?"

"You wouldn't be living with it alone. It wouldn't be consuming you like it is now. It would be helping you grow."

I sighed. "I wish I was a part of your family instead."

Ms. May smiled. "You don't have to wish it. I already care about you the way I care about family."

I smiled too. "I should go." I stood up from the steps, grabbing my crackers as I did, before leaving her at the staircase.