An Eye For An Eye

Seize

The Beatles was playing as I sat next to him on the sofa. It was the song that had kept getting stuck in my head, I Want To Hold Your Hand. I didn't feel like writing, even though I would have loved to read to him. Instead, I rested my head on his shoulder and listened to the music.

“Are you alright?” he asked.
“I don't know,” I said honestly. Things sort of felt weird. I wasn't sure if I was going to cry or if I just felt nothing, like a weird emotional shock. “I really don't know.”
“You're an intelligent lady, I'm sure you'll be fine,” he said, his hand resting on my knee.
“I wouldn't describe myself as a lady,” I said, lifting my head a little to look at his face.
“I would.”

I rested my head on his shoulder again, I felt weirdly safe here, high above everyone else. His thumb traced soothing circles and his voice was calming and that was what I needed right now.
“I really don't know how to thank you enough,” I told him.
“You don't have to.”

I sighed. “I’m tired,” I said. “But I have the horrible feeling I won’t be able to sleep.”
“If you fall asleep here then I’ll carry you back to your room,” he said. I smiled, I didn’t doubt he would do that for a moment. He certainly had the strength to but he’d have to partially shift to see where he was going. “And if you want to talk, I can listen.”

“I just… it’s what he said, about being homeless because I’d never make it as a freelancer,” I said, taking him up on the offer of talking. I didn’t expect him to say much back, he hated Dad and right now, I was inclined to agree with Deucalion. “It just hurt, he always said he never minded it, just that he thought it was a bit of a waste of my time.”
“I don't think it is,” he said.
“I know you don’t,” I said, smiling a bit. “But he did. And I think… I don’t know, it just hurts to realise he never really cared at all.”

“That would hurt,” he said. His hand moved from my knee to hold my hand. “I can understand why you’re upset.”
“I’m sorry I’m just telling you all of this,” I said, shaking my head.
“No, if it helps I don’t mind.”
“I’ve talked to you for all of three days, even if they were rather odd, especially everything leading up to them.”

“Why should that matter?”
“I don’t know, usually how long you’ve known someone has a lot to do with things.”
“Not always,” he said.
My brow furrowed. “Not always? What do you mean?”
“I’ve turned Betas because they’ve asked and I’ve turned people because they were dying, how long I had known them has had nothing to do with their status in the pack.” He had a point but werewolf packs didn’t really function the same as other relationships. I wasn’t even sure what sort of relationship this was.

“I should go to sleep but I can’t be bothered to get up,” I mumbled.
He chuckled. “I’d offer to carry you but I think I’d know the answer to that.”
“No, don’t carry me,” I said, shaking my head.
“I thought you might say that,” he said with a smile on his face.

“You know, you have really soft sweaters,” I said in a feeble attempt to change the topic.
“I know,” he said. “They’re comfortable so I wear them.”
“But they’re just so soft,” I repeated and he just shook his head at me. “How are they so soft?”
“I don’t know, I don’t make them,” he said. “You should get some sleep, otherwise you’ll regret it tomorrow.”

Sighing, I pushed myself off the sofa and turned to face him.
“Goodnight, Deuc,” I said. “And again, thank you.”
“Stop thanking me,” he said. But I’d probably still thank him again tomorrow. “And goodnight, Liza. Get some sleep.”
“I’ll try, no promises,” I said as I headed to the guest bedroom.

Shutting the door behind me, I smiled to myself and then frowned. I couldn’t go back to Chris or Kara. Dad would probably have practically disowned me at this point. I took my phone from my pocket and put it in the draw of the bedside table. It was still turned off. I pulled out pajamas from my bag and changed into them. I had brought some pajamas and had left most of my jeans since I was trying to change what I was wearing so I didn’t get recognised.

Lying on the bed, I stared up at the ceiling, fighting the urge to cry. I couldn’t cry, not after all this. I had cried earlier and it hadn’t really helped anything.

Realising the blinds and the curtains were open, I stared at them for a moment before getting up to close them. I could see the stars tonight, the sky was cloudless and the moon’s crescent was tiny and since it had been a crescent closer to a half moon last night, I figured that it would be a new moon on one of the next nights.

After shutting the curtains, I collapsed back onto the bed and curled up underneath the covers. I was going to need coffee tomorrow and I knew there wasn’t going to be any. There would be tea though, and no Dad yelling at me. No longer would I have to worry about lying to Kara or Chris because Deucalion knew what had happened, he was there. I didn’t have to lie to him about anything and I didn’t want to lie to him, not that I had any reason to.

I was grateful that he had let me stay here, despite the other Alphas, and I would have to pay him back somehow. It felt a little rude to just leave it at thank you when I would have been sleeping on the streets if not for him.

Closing my eyes, I wished sleep would come soon but it didn’t seem to want to, leaving me tossing and turning and struggling to get comfortable during the night. And unfortunately it felt like nothing new, I hadn’t slept properly since I had left here and gone home. Maybe it wouldn’t be as bad now I was back with Deucalion and away from Dad.