Written In The Stars - First Draft (Published Under Immac PPH)

CHAPTER 10

Written In The Stars

Valerie's POV

"Thanks, although you shouldn't have."

His coat kept me warm amidst the cold and frigid breeze the air brought, he never left even when I already thanked him. Mikhel just stood there, behind me, he was also looking at the emptiness my eyes wandered on. It was just simply the Valdez's front yard, but it was better than staying inside and continue pretending that nothing affects me. I could hear how much Mikhel's continuous sighs just went on and on, I looked back to face him. Obviously, he was already feeling cold and it was about to rain, yet he never left or went back inside... He stayed with me, this time.

It was hard for me to keep a straight face, it made me wonder about things I don't usually think about. If I'm so angry at him for leaving, why can't I push him away this time? Mikhel was silent the entire time, he never spoke or even bothered to start a conversation with me. It felt like he still knew me very well, that he knows I wouldn't want to engage in a conversation with him even if he would try his very best to start one. I wouldn't want to talk to him yet... After what happened back at the parking lot, we're not in good terms for me.

It was starting to rain and it was much more colder, Mikhel's coat did help because it managed to keep the warmth but seeing him shiver for a bit made me feel guilty for using his coat, even if he was the one who lend it to me. Instead of giving it back to him, I walked pass him to lead the way back inside. I know he'd follow me. And he did. When we were both back inside, Sabrina was the first person who noticed, it was because she was close to the door since she's talking to some friends.

"Hey..." She said but then trailed off when she saw the coat I was wearing, then she averted her gaze upon Mikhel who's still behind me. I couldn't make up the expression on her face, it was like she was confused and I can't blame her for that... "Mikhel! It's been a while... I didn't expect I would see you here... and with Valerie." She even teased.

"I went outside to be alone for a while, I didn't know he was also there." I defended myself even if there's no reason to do so. I just don't want her to assume things. Mikhel and I never even talked about settling our issues from the past, or my issues... I still held on to what happened before, it traumatized me and I can't simply let go of it. It was hard to let go of what happened. Especially when it still felt fresh, a year was never the basis of lesser pain. It was just the same, I just learned how to live with the scars. "Uh, here."

I took his coat off and handed it back to him. He was startled and had no time to react, he immediately moved in swift to catch the coat since it almost dropped. Then, I walked away. I went back to the table where I stayed earlier with Bea and Elijah. They were still talking there but Tyler and Clare are no longer seated in front of me. They were somehow still visible in my sight but they were a bit far, standing near the long table while drinking champagne. I sat there, watching them.

There was something in his stares that broke my heart, there was something with the way he looks at her and it was very clear. I would be selfish to wish that maybe... just maybe, it would be the same if he was with me. But then it was also as clear as daylight, he stares at her just like how I stare at him and he never looks at me that way. And in the end, as the vivid image of them staring at each other would replay in my mind over and over, I know it could never be me. That in a moment like this, I would've been selfish. I want to be selfish.

I find it so naive, I find it so unfair. Out of all the people I'd come across with, it's too ironic how I have ended up falling in love with my best friend. Who can never be mine. Because I am just a friend to him. It was always my place in his heart. I don't know how to get rid of what I feel, it's uncontrollable. But it hurts. It hurts so much and I don't know how to fix myself because it feels like I'm waiting on someone who already made it clear that it's impossible.