Valentine's Day at Gintama High School

Chapter 3: Protect the Family Jewels

"What are you kids doing up here?"

Sougo and Kagura turned to see their sensei, Ginpachi, step on to the roof.

"Oh, G-Ginpachi-sensei we were just—um—" Kagura began saying when Ginpachi excused her by waving his hand.

"I didn't actually want an explanation. I was just forced by the other teachers to come and get you fools to go to class," he told them with his arms crossed. "The bell rang ten minutes ago."

"Oh, sorry about that, Ginpachi-sensei. I couldn't hear the bell over all her yapping," Sougo replied, pointing at Kagura.

Kagura glared sideways at him and hissed, "You wanna die?"

"I don't care whether you guys kill each other or not, but do that after school please," Ginpachi said as he walked over to the two and stopped in front of them. "Now follow me, you delinquents." 

"Yes, sir~" they responded in unison before following Ginpachi to the door.

Ginpachi reached his hand out to grab the door handle as he looked back to lecture them. "Honestly, you guys make my job ten times harder. Where do you get all that unnecessary energy any-huh?"

Ginpachi gripped something soft and squishy with his hand, and he felt sweat begin to form on his forehead. 

"S-since when was the door handle this-ah," Ginpachi stopped mid-sentence when he turned and saw what his hand was on.

Tsukuyo looked down at his hand on her chest, and her face quickly turned completely red. 

"W-wait a second, Tsukuyo. It's not what-"

"What... THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" Tsukuyo screamed as she performed a German suplex, flipping Ginpachi over onto his head.

After Tsukuyo let him go and stood back up, Ginpachi crumbled into a heap on the ground while Kagura and Sougo snickered at the scene.

Sougo turned to Tsukuyo and said, "We'll be off to class, Sensei!"

Kagura jumped when Sougo suddenly took her hand and began descending the steps. She began to protest, but Sougo simply ignored her and whispered to Ginpachi-sensei on the way down. "Have fun with your Valentine."

At that, Ginpachi bolted his head up to stare at Sougo as he led Kagura out of sight. From below, Kagura exclaimed, "Where the hell are taking me? That's not the way—" before she was abruptly cut off.

Ginpachi, who went red upon hearing Sougo's words, glanced up at the girl behind him. She was in her usual white lab coat, blue dress shirt, and black pencil skirt, an outfit he secretly liked because it matched his own. He hoped she was imitating his style out of admiration, but her current expression said otherwise. Tsukuyo was glaring at him with glowing red eyes as a menacing aura surrounded her. If looks could kill, he'd surely be dead right now.

My Valentine? Yeah, right. More like my grim reaper, Ginpachi thought as a shiver ran through his spine.

Getting up from the floor, Ginpachi said, "Sorry, Tsukuyo. I was seriously just holding my hand out to open the door when you came. That's all it was. I swear."

Tsukuyo scoffed at his excuse and stalked away to the roof railing. "I'm just here for a smoke break, so if you're done with the Kagura and Sougo business, you can leave."

Ginpachi cleared his throat before joining Tsukuyo at the railing. "I could use a smoke break too."

Tsukuyo looked sideways at Ginpachi with a raised eyebrow. "Do you even smoke?"