Valentine's Day at Gintama High School

Chapter 8: Mother Doesn't Have Time to Watch Over Two Idiots

Upon entering the gym, the temperature seemed to rise a good ten degrees (Fahrenheit not Celsius—that would be death) and Sougo was already beginning to regret wearing a suit as he grew hotter under his suit jacket. When the five of them entered the gym, it was already packed with people dancing to Otsu blasting through the speakers. A fog machine covered the hardwood floor with a layer of mist that swirled around in brilliant colors as it reflected the flashing lights, and the walls were lined with red, pink, and white balloons. 

"Wow, they put a lot more effort into this than I thought they would," Sougo remarked.

While the girls near the door didn't bother to turn their heads when they heard the door open, they were all of sudden very interested in the new arrivals when they heard Sougo's voice. Turning to see Sougo in a suit, the girls feasted their eyes on his glory and proceeded to screech in unison. As they jumped forward to swarm him, Sougo sighed and thought, Now I really regret wearing this suit.

Before the girls could reach him, however, Kagura swung her leg out in a circle to keep them away. Setting her foot down with enough force to crack the floor, she hissed, "Back off. He's my fish."

The girls gasped, and one asked, incredulous, "You're his date? Did you blackmail him, you little bi-"

Kagura grabbed the girl's face, covering her mouth, and leaned in closer to whisper, "You try to insult me one more time, and I'll make sure you never speak again, bitch."

After Kagura pushed her away, the girl frantically darted away, tripping on her heels. The other girls were momentarily paralyzed, but with a puff of her chest and a killer glare, Kagura sent the rest of the girls running too. Sougo stood behind her, laughing silently at the scene. Otae applauded while Hijikata just shivered.

Kagura turned back to smile at Sougo and hold out her hand. "Well, would you care for a dance, my little fish?"

Sougo laughed out loud as he took her hand. "Why fish? You gonna eat me?"

Kagura simply shrugged as she dragged Sougo to the center of the dance floor.

Hijikata shook his head in disbelief and said, "Kagura sure is something else."

Kondo, who had finally stood back up after being dragged, added, "You're right about that, but she's still not as amazing as Otae-san."

Afterwards, Kondo turned to smile at Otae only to look at thin air. Kondo whipped his head around to find Otae, but she had suddenly vanished.

"Sh-she was just here a second ago!" Kondo cried, pulling at his hair.

Hijikata sighed and patted Kondo on the shoulder.

"Good luck," he told Kondo before going to watch over Sougo.

"OTAE-SAAAAANN~!" Kondo called out as he ran into the crowd in search.

Meanwhile, a wild Sarutobi was scanning the room for her prey. Since there were a lot of people, it took longer than usual to locate him, but it still only took her five seconds. Usually it takes two. She skipped happily to the snack table where Ginpachi was stuffing his face. (Luckily, Tsukuyo refrained from drinking to supervise the dance, so Ginpachi survived until the evening.)

"Ginpachi-sensei~!" she cooed.

He turned around just in time to see Sarutobi jump up and hug him, wrapping her legs around his waist.

"SARUTOBI, GET OFF ME!!" Ginpachi screamed, pushing her face away from his.

"No! Why should I have to let go of my date?" she asked, holding onto him like an iron bear trap.