MALANG

20. Malang

"Hey, how are you?" Suvek's lazy voice drifted over the phone's speaker. I looked in that direction and took a sip of my chamomile tea.

I didn't want to answer this question. But I didn't want to appear rude either... not atleast a night before my second marriage.

"Excited?" No, that was a lie. I was just nervous as fuck. That's it.

"Me too." Suvek drawled seductively. "But don't worry, everything will be fine tomorrow."

Which everything was going to be fine? My second marriage or Kabir's transplantation surgery? Yes, Kabir was going to be operated on the same day as of our marriage. Ironic much, but not surprising at all. Somewhere down the line I always knew that I was going to land up in this crossroad.

"Yeah, hope so." I took another sip. "So are you sure you're not going to tell anything to your parents as of now?"

"Not until they decide to get us married traditionally, which I'm sure, is not going to take very long."

A tiny smile escaped my lips. Huh, this guy was way too optimistic for me.

"If you say so."

"I want to say something elsee too."

"What?" I crunched my brows.

"I love you."

I closed my eyes feeling numb all over again. I didn't love Suvek. I was more sure about it than anything else in this world.

But how was I supposed to say that to him?

"Nitya, are you there?"

"Yess.." I nodded at oblivion.

"You didn't reply?"

"Feeling a bit sleepy, Suvek." I lied again. Yeah, chamomile tea was supposed to calm my nerves and bring me goodnight sleep, but unfortunately it wasn't working properly right now.

"Okay then. Go to the bed and sleep tight." I could hear Suvek smiling on the other side. But what was he so happy for? He clearly knew that I was avoiding reciprocating to his feelings like always.

"Goodnight, Suvek. Lets meet at eleven at the marriage registrar's office tomorrow."

"Don't be late.... I will feel bad if my bride keeps me waiting."

"Your bride will keep that in mind."

"Hmm.. bye."

"Bye." I disconnected the call and scrolled through the log for a while. All the recent calls were made by Suvek. I had called him once or twice but there was absolutely no call from Vani. She hadn't contacted me in ten days. It was perhaps the longest time we had spent withought speaking to each other.

With a heavy, guilty heart I set an alarm of eight o' clock in the morning and tucked myself in the comforter.

With a mind full of bizzare thoughts sleeping was next to impossible. Yet I tried. I tried not to feel guilty about Vani.. or think about Kabir... I just hoped that he was well.

Before leaving for Jaisalmer, Vani had told me about Kabir's condition. I guess she wanted me to stay there with him so that his appetite for life got boosted. But I had already proposed Suvek by then! I didn't know if I was wrong, but the look on Kabir's face had been disturbing enough. It didn't let me sleep for the past nine days. Every time I tried to close my eyes I found myself remembering it, a look of plain hurt and disbelief. I couldn't understand why he gave me that look. He didn't really care about me, isn't it? Then why??

I groaned aloud and changed my side. Living alone in this flat was frustrating. The idea of marrying Suvek was even more frustrating... I mean sure he was a good friend and all, but people don't always go marrying their special friends, do they?