Second chances

CHAPTER 9

Darth Vader's POV

The first thing I heard was a beeping sound. I recognized it as a life-monitoring machine. But something wasn't right. No, no, maybe no not right, but different. I realized I hear only the machine. There are no other sounds. I should hear my breathing. Why don't I? Surely I am breathing. Suddenly everything came back. Ahsoka, the operation. Operation. I am after operation that should have get me out of the suit, repair my body. Is that why I don't hear my respirator? Because I don't need it anymore? I took in a deep breath and, yes, it was a natural breathing sound. I wanted to open my eyes. But what if this is just an illusion? What if this is a dream and when I open my eyes I'll see world through red lenses? I needed to know. Slowly, I opened my eyes. And immediately shut them again. It was too bright. Wait, too bright? I risked opening my eyes again, and saw a bright light. It wasn't red. The shapes and colors came into my view, all as they should be. A white, not red wall.

"Hey," I heard and turned my head a little to the right. I, of course, saw her before. But now, she wasn't red. Orange skin, white face-patterns (however different they were), sparky blue eyes. Even though they were clouded. But the spark was still there. The same spark she cheered everyone up with during the Clone war.
,"Hey," she spoke again. I could answer. Does my voice now sound like it did before Mustafar? Only one way to find out.

"Hey," it felt strange to hear my own voice again. And judging by the look on Ahsoka's face it was strange for her, too.

"I must say, they did a good job. You look just like before," she said as she stood up and brought a small mirror which she offered me.

"You were sleeping for six days now. Wanna try to use your new limbs?" I looked at the mirror and tried to lift my right hand. It took some effort, but I was able to lift it enough to reach for the mirror. I grasped it, but Ahsoka didn't let go. I looked at her quizzically.
"You probably can't hold it on your own just yet," That may be true. I moved the mirror, while Ahsoka was holding it, so I could see my face. It was a good thing she was doing that, because I let it go the second I saw myself. I looked exactly the way I did before. Well, no exactly, they healed the scar I had over my right eye, so that was different. But my face, my hair were the same. My eyes intrigued me the most. They were yellow with blue stains. I didn't know something like that was possible. I don't know for how long I was staring at my face, when the rest of my body came to my mind. I looked down. The skin was healthy, no respirator, my limbs looked real. Technically they were prosthesis, but weren't made of artificial substances. I saw ugly scars where they connected with my body and could tell these scars were on my legs, too. Ahsoka saw me frown at them and said:

"Your scars will heal. Sure, they won't go away completely, but it will look better, I promise,"

"Good," was everything I said.

"That's it? Good? What about "thank you"?" she said loudly and stood up. I looked at her surprised. I didn't expect outburst from her. Before I could say anything, she continued:

"If it wouldn't be for me you would still be in that kriffing suit of yours, slaving to your master!" she yelled with fury and tears in her eyes and stormed out of the room.

What the hell was that? Okey, maybe I was a little cold, but certainly not cold enough to gain that kind of reaction. Or, was I? Still, I knew her well enough to know there is something else.

And I am going to find out what it is.

Ahsoka's POV

I practically ran to fresher and let tears stream down my face. Good. Nothing else? Not even a smile? Or a look of gratitude? Nothing? Just, good. The moment I saw his eyes, every memory I had of him came rushing before me. The bond filled with mutual mischief, sorrow, love, care, worry and regret. I thought that maybe, doing all of this for him will make him forgive me for leaving. It appears I was wrong. He just doesn't care anymore. It would be for best if I took him on Mortis to Luke and Leia and then left. He doesn't need me, nor does he want me. Luke and Leia will forget about me the second they'll know their father is alive. I am no good to anyone anymore. Noone cares. During my spying for the rebellion I was able to put it away, had to much work. But now, now I can't stop it. Can't stop the truth from crushing me. It would be too easy just to ignite one rightly placed blade. One push of a button.
But...maybe there was one person. One I didn't see since the end of a war. One I could never find unless the Force wouldn't show me the way. I knew it wouldn't. I am too blocked right now. But I need a reason to hold on. A goal. From now on, the goal will be to became in tune with the Force enough for it to show me where Rex is. Then, I will go and find him. We agreed to part ways, because we thought it would be too dangerous to stay together. And while that is true, I learnt to mask myself well. It shouldn't be such a problem anymore.