Bungou Stray Dogs Oneshots

Akutagawa - Eyes [2]

(a/n) Surpise! I guess hehe, I don't know what this was, I just had a sudden impulse on writing, plus, I'm annoyed that I didn't give proper endings on the stories I wrote.

미안해... Sorry.. Hehe

"was he satiating his hunger or was he asking for the warmth of his mother?"
- Zombie Kid

I walked in the hallways of the mafia, proceeding to go back to my quarters, days have been the same of course, I still am an empty can, I'm missing something, But What?

I've thought about it so much that I didn't realize that I was in front of my room's door, waiting for me to open it.

I observe the dark wood it's made of, the intricate details the carving has, the gloss that I can see from the artificial light hanging above my head.

"No, not yet" I thought

I don't want to be secluded alone in a room again, sure I'm thinking of something and the thing I need must be isolation to think about it, but for some reason no, coming to a room alone, just makes breathing, harder, making the burdens I have heavier, it's as if the walls were closing slowly, crushing me till I broke to pieces, till I surrender because of my head being heavier and heavier each day.

Even if I stay there, I wouldn't able to sleep anyways, what's a bed if I can't even sleep a wink

I sigh, looking away at the wooden object walking away, looking for a place that I can seek comfort

The aerial garden, I ended up here for some reason, the garden that connects the two buildings of the mafia, with live plants shining under the moonlight.

This place was never special to me, I come here once in a while to just walk or to even just stare at the plants or insects I come around with

As the petals of the flowers shined under the moonlight, it felt as if the impending pressure I had before in the hallway dissappeared, I didn't felt as if I was going to be crushed anymore, atleast for now.

I walked toward the huge tree in the center, observing how the moonlight was falling directly in the middle, right where it was.

The night was serene for sure, with the moon shining together with the stars, A sign that no rain is to come. Together with the sounds of the city that you can hear in a distance, or just even the sound of the wind, it was relaxing indeed.

But as I was observing my surroundings i noticed a figure stand on the other side, doing the same as I was, staring at the tree, as if being mesmerized by it's existence

Again, those eyes, were similar to mine, it felt as they too, were empty cans.

"Stop Staring" the boy said, or should I say, Akutagawa said, not moving an inch to where he was

"I'm allowed to stare at everything I want to" I responded

He shifted and proceeded to glance at me, a glint of anger present in his eyes, clearly he was annoyed

"But I don't, you staring at me annoys me, let alone your presence"

"That's rude, considering that technically, i'm your senior" I replied, amused by the dignity this boy has

He uncomfortably moved, probably surprised by what I said, and proceeded to look down

"You" I said

"Me?" he asked glancing up, asking if he was the one I was referring to

"Yes you, who do you I expect to talk to? the tree?" I replied snarkily, taking my revenge to his rude reply earlier.

He didn't replied instead he went back to looking in the tree, following an audible click of the mouth

"Rude, very rude" I thought

I walked towards him, I was know beside him, keeping a safe distance so that neither of us would feel an uncomfortable tension.

"You're a bad liar you know, a terrible one" I said

"You're one to say, you look the exact same." He replied

"Great! Know we know that we have one thing in common!" I said with a tint of sarcasm in my voice.

I heard clicked again his tongue again

"I swear if he keeps clicking his tongue i won't hesitate to cut and chop that tongue of his, we're the same age yet he tries so hard to act like an grown up man, how childish" I thought

"You're gonna keep that facade of yours up huh? Is your pride that high?you're too transparent I can see through your eyes that you're actually weak, very very weak. I can easily compare you to a kid" I said

Suddenly I felt the collar of my clothing being dragged up swiftly, forcing me to look up and meet his enraged eyes, full of anger

"Y-you..." he whispered, his voice shaking, ready to explode

I raised my eyebrows, not affected by the slightest bit that my clothes is gonna rip

"HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT I'M WEAK! HOW? HUH? HAVE YOU SEEN HOW HARD I TRAINED, HOW HARD I ABUSED MY ABILITY TO THE POINT THAT I WAS READY TO BE CONSUMED BY IT!! DID YOU SEE THAT EVEN THROUGH ALL THE THINGS THAT I WENT THROUGH... after all the things I went through and did..... it was still... Not enough.... For Dazai-san"

I didn't respond to his outburst, yet I continued listening, for sure, he's been bottling this up for a long time. Lucky

Dazai huh? The traitor? Was he the mentor of this guy? He's trying to impress that death-obsessed bastard? How disappointing

I was cut of by my thoughts with him
whispering

"... How the hell... Can you compare me.... With a child..." He said still holding me up while looking at the ground, his hands were shaky, his already pale hands turning paler, ready to turn into a purple hue.

I stared at him, emotionless, not feeling a bit of sympathy for him, even though the guy just had a full on outburst at me.

"Because unlike me, I can see that you yearn to be loved"

I replied, gently placing my hands to his hair, gently patting it, taking him off guard

His eyes widened as he slowly releases his grip from my collar, placing me back down, but still looking down.

I continue patting his head, surprisingly, his hair was soft.

But suddenly he slapped my hand away

"Stop it" He said

I smiled gently, before turning my back on him and walking away, returning to my quarters.

"where are you going?" he asked

I stopped at my tracks, surprised by the sudden question

"Going back to my quarters" I replied calmly, my back facing him

He didn't reply, as he just stared at may back

I proceeded to say something before leaving

"You can chose to forget everything I said, after all, who am I to say, I'm a bad liar too am I?" I told him as I gave him a glance.

He must've been surprised as to what I've said as his posture stiffened

I continued walking back to my quarters

"I think, this time, I might be able to sleep" I thought as was nearing the door of my room.

"it's ironic to think that the one who needs help is the one that is helping others"