Wonderland (Troyler)

Chapter Three

TROYES POV:

I see Phoebe pulling up, I jump up off the curb and waved. She made a turn and pulled up right next to me. She rolled down the window "You can put your stuff in the trunk, I'll help you unpack when we get to my place" Phoebe said.

I nodded and went to the back of the car, I opened the trunk and threw my bag in the back. Right before I closed it I remembered I out the razor in the bag, I took it out and out it in my shirt pocket, just in case she saw in when she helped me unpack.

I know she's my best friend, and I tell her everything, but I didn't tell her that I use to self-harm or be depressed, I never told anybody, and I'm gonna keep it that way.

I slam the trunk and run up to the pass anger door, she unlocks it and I jump right it, and she drives just as I shut the door.

On the way to her house, we had long talks, we were telling jokes, and jamming out to Taylor Swift. I started singing "Blank Space"

"Wow Troye you can really sing!" Phoebe exclaimed

I laughed, "yeah okay" I said Sarcastically

"Troye I'm fucking serious, you're actually amazing, why don't you sing more often?"

"Well I use to right songs at one period in my life,
bu- nevermind"

"Troye come on, at least give me a title to one of them"

"Happy little Pill"

"Why are you writing about antidepressants?"

"It was for a friend" I lied

I use to write songs when I was depressed, it was kinda my escape.

"So why did you stop writing?" Phoebe said

"Well I kinda grew out of that phase, but I was on my laptop, and found this website YouTube, and all these amazing people were making videos about their life and skits and covers and just a whole bunch of other things, it kind of wanted me to make my own channel, but I didn't really have the time"

"You should start making videos, I think people will enjoy you. I mean you're cute, funny, relatable, and just really nice, and have a great personality, just give it a shot"

The only think was I was scared of hate and people not liking me. It's not that all I want is nice comments and for everyone to like me. I just get really bad anxiety, and build up so much fear in my brain and just beefy with really bad thoughts. A lot of people can cope with hate, I'm just not one of those people.

The rest of the car ride was silent, besides Betty Who playing on the radio, but the volume was so low, you could barely hear it. I tilt my head to the side and desire to take a little nap.