Glass house

-4- I'm desperate, if nothing else

        We promptly arrived at the hospital about a half hour after I hung up on Joshua.

         “Why are we here?” Nash asked, pulling into a parking spot.

        “It’s something with my family.” I vaguely informed him, a coldness lingering in my voice.

        “Conor, I know you don’t like opening up to me, I know you have a rough situation right now. But I really need to know what’s up. This is obviously a big deal, and I want to be there for you.” Nash urged me to open up. My eyes burned with tears of appreciation and sadness.

        “When we get back to your house, I’ll explain everything.” I hugged him slightly awkwardly from the passenger side.

        “Promise?” He asked, pushing my face further into his chest.

        “Promise.” I allowed myself to relax to the beat of his heart before pulling away. “Let’s go.” I whispered, unbuckling my seat belt and heading to the entrance of the hospital. The one in the morning eerie feeling was just beginning to settle onto LA. Nash and I walked together. I looked at him, terrified. He looked back, grabbing my hand with a sympathetic look in his eyes.

        Hand in hand, we arrived to the entrance, Joshua was outside waiting with a cigarette in his mouth.

        “Josh-“ I began, catching Joshua's attention immediately.

        “Conor?” He put out his cigarette by hastily throwing it on the ground and stomping on it. He quickly ran over to me and hugged me tightly. I let go of Nash’s  hand and hugged him back. Warm tears falling lightly from my eyes. “You look so different!” He excitedly spun me around. He soon put me down, backing away to get a good look at me.

        “Well of course I look different you idiot!” I joked, punching his arm. “That’s what happens when you don’t see someone for a few years.” I sarcastically rolled my eyes. He tensed up at my comment.

        “We both know he would’ve freaked if i called and-“ He glared at Nash, unsure if he should finish his sentence. “ya know.” He shrugged, hoping I knew what he was implying.

        “Yeah I know.” I reassured him, squeezing his shoulder.

        “So who’s this?” Joshua defensively asked. I felt a warmth inside my stomach over how protective he was over me, even though we haven’t spoken in so long. He still cared.

        “Oh, This is my friend Nash!” I introduced him, pushing him a little closer towards my brother.

        “Hi Nash…” Joshua skeptically greeted him, sticking out his hand for a handshake. “I’m Joshua, Conors brother.” He shook his hand firmly. Nash gulped with fear, shaking back.

        “Alright, so Joshua…” I began, trying to ease the tension. He looked at me, a sad expression coming over his face as he realized what I was going to say next. “The notes?” I asked, trying to sound as sympathetic as I could.

        “The notes.” He repeated, removing the drawstring bag from his back and opening it. He pulled out two long white envelopes, one addressed to me and one blank one. The one with the blank label was already opened. I took them into my hands, trying my best to not shake.

        “What’s the blank one?” I hesitantly asked.

        “It’s his general note I guess. He wrote us each separate ones, then one big one for everyone else. I thought you might be interested in seeing it.” Joshua informed me. I tucked them under my arms.

        “Thank you.” I nodded, moving a little closer to Nash so he didn’t feel left out. “Will you be here tomorrow?” I asked Joshua.

        “Yeah, I think so. I’m on a kinda break, so I’ll be here until…Ya know.” He commented, suggesting that dad might die. I nodded my head, looking at the ground.

        “Nash and I have some friends to meet up with, We’ve already kept them waiting for so long. I’ll see you soon. You know my number, call me in the morning” I gently told him.

        “Alright.” Joshua awkwardly answered. “It was nice meeting you Nash.” He confessed to Nash.

        “You too.” Nash almost whispered, putting his arm around me to start walking.

        “Love you Joshie.” I smiled, trying to comfort him. He smiled, laughing at the memories of me calling him Joshie in our childhood.

        “Love you too Conman.” He laughed, turning around and walking back into the hospital. Nash started to pull for us to start walking, but I didn’t budge. I continued to watch my brothers figure travel through the corridor.

        “Conor?” Nash questioned, looking at my face. I didn’t dare take my eyes off of Joshua.

        “Just give me a second.” I grumbled.

        “Okay.” Nash responded, still keeping his arms around me tightly. I watched Joshua until he disappeared into an elevator. I had a flashback of when Nash wouldn’t leave until he saw I was safely in my car and driving away. I closed my eyes tightly, allowing myself to melt into Nash’s hold.

        “Okay,” I breathed, “I’m ready to go.”